1) Hi! I have a question about orgasms. I'm a female who has masturbated since her early teens and wonder if I've "overdone" it somewhat. I did it so frequently (sometimes every other day or so; sometimes I waited longer) that now that I'm in my early 20s, I find it harder to reach orgasm, and harder to have multiple orgasms (it used to come so easily to me). Have I "lost" that momentum? Can I regain it if, say, I stopped masturbating for several weeks or months?

Also, my partner stimulates me manually or with his tongue, and I haven't been able to "come" yet... is it because I've masturbated too much? Do women take longer to come? I think he gets bored doing it...

2) My boyfriend has trouble ejaculating, usually taking a long time. I was wondering if it could have to do with his constant masturbation during most of his young life. Could it be that the problem is me? Is there a possibility that we can improve the situation?

I enjoy performing cunnilingus on my girlfriend, and every so often, I get a sore throat. My question is, is it all right to perform cunnilingus on my girlfriend if I have a sore throat? Or is there a chance that whatever causing my throat discomfort could cause her trouble as well? Can the “giver” of oral sex pass along sore throat germs to the “receiver”?

My girlfriend and I have oral sex. I heard that if you blow in the vagina of a female that it could kill her. Is that true?

I've noticed when I get highly sexually aroused, my fingers get numb, and so do my lips. Is this normal?

If a woman doesn't come or have an orgasm, can her ovaries hurt just like a man's testicles can hurt if he doesn't come?

I have a latex sensitivity, but would like to perform safer oral sex. Are lubricants on non-latex condoms harmful if ingested? I can't seem to find non-latex, non-lubricated condoms anywhere.

Since orgasms cause a release of endorphins into one's cerebral-spinal fluid and endorphins are also somewhat responsible for the emotion of happiness, etc., is it possible that excessive masturbation and/or intercourse would lead to a depleted level of endorphins in the system that could in turn cause one's affect to become somewhat "flat"? Could a sustained low level of endorphins in the system induce depression and/or mood disorder?

I was wondering about the depth of the vagina. I've read statistics that say that the average vagina is only 3 to 4 inches deep. This seems way too small to me, since the average penis is considerably longer than that. Wouldn't that mean that most penises would crash into the cervix repeatedly during intercourse? Since this obviously doesn't happen, my question is this: does the vagina actually elongate during intercourse to accommodate the entire length of the average penis?

Dear Alice, 

I take Valtrex daily to protect me from cold sores I get on my face. I haven’t had one since I started taking it a few years ago. My partner gets cold sores on his mouth and has recently performed oral sex on me while having a cold sore. Will the daily Valtrex protect me from developing genital herpes? How will this affect me in the future?

What are the risks of HIV infection for the passive partner of oral sex?

My wife and I had our first child last July. Until about 3 months ago, she was unable to reach orgasm at all. Of late, she has very small one's, but they don't seem to be getting much better. Prior to having the baby, she had strong, very quick (3-5 minutes) orgasms 90% of the time. I know the stress of being at work rather than home with the baby could play a part in this. Is this common and is there a way to mitigate the problem? 

If one has a long-term partner and neither AIDS nor any other STD is a concern, is there any medical reason not to perform cunnilingus on a menstruating woman? My significant other is particularly horny during her period and would love cunnilingus at this time. I am willing but curious.

I am curious about double penetration (two penises in one vagina). Because of the increased friction, even if both men are wearing condoms, is there more of a risk that the condoms would break?

I currently use NuvaRing for contraception. Because the ring slowly emits hormones into the body via the vagina, my partner and I are wondering whether he will have an unhealthy amount of contact with these hormones during oral sex. Thanks.

I am a well-adjusted late twenties male with a steady girlfriend. Lately, I have been increasingly fantasizing about various types of anal penetration. I have discovered that during masturbation, this brings me very intense pain/pleasure. Even though I think it may be satisfying to experiment with a vibrator or other objects inserted by my girlfriend, I find myself drawn toward trying the real thing (i.e., having anal sex with a penis). The problem is, I definitely do not consider myself homosexual and, in fact, the thought of the actual act with another man actually repulses me. Am I trying to have the real thing without going through a bisexual experiment or what?

I'm wondering if washing immediately and throughly after intercourse helps prevent pregnancy.

My boyfriend recently told me that he rarely has orgasms when he ejaculates. I was aware that men could have orgasms without ejaculation, but I didn't think it worked the other way around. Are men more complicated than I thought?

I have encountered a problem I never expected; my boyfriend is quite simply very large. I am unable to perform oral sex except for the first couple of inches due to the girth, and vaginal sex is not totally satisfying for him because he is too long and cannot fully penetrate without causing me significant pain. I've seen my doctor, and am reassured that there is physically nothing wrong with me — no infections or scarring, but am finding it difficult to come up with a solution. Any suggestions?

Some of the girls at my school talk about how their boyfriends got to first, second, or third base with them. I feel kind of left out because I don't know exactly what they are. Could you tell me what the bases are for girls and guys? I'd really appreciate it.

I am just curious about sex, and why is it such a turn on?? Is it the physical contact or sexual actions?? Or is it endorphins spreading through the body while it is happening??

If my partner and I have been monogamous for three years (and I was a virgin before we met) and my partner tested negative for the HIV virus (twice, about two years ago, with a six-month gap between the tests) is it safe for us to use a birth control method other than a condom? That is, are there still any STDs that my partner might have without knowing it, that we should be worried about, even though nothing whatsoever has seemed wrong with either of us for three years and my partner has had several regular annual physicals in that time?

1) My partner seemed to pass urine while ejaculating. Is this normal and what would be the cause of it?\

2) Every time I feel like I want to orgasm, I stop because it feels like I have to pee. I don't know if I have to pee or if I'm really having an orgasm. Please help.

Is it possible to get sick from oral sex, when your partner doesn't have any STD's? I've only ever had one partner, and recently I performed oral sex on him. Only ever since I have had a sore throat, and swollen glands. Is this related, or did I just pick up cold germs he was carrying?

After you have sex, how long should you wait till you do it again?

If a man is performing anal sex, can he actually feel his partner's waste products? Please answer because I read somewhere that the proper thing to do is perform an enema first and I can't believe this is true.

Do you and your husband both have to orgasm in order to get pregnant?

1) I'm not an inexperienced girl at masturbation. I've been doing it for a very long time, but actually only ever discovered what an orgasm was when I was 18 and got my first vibrator. This never bothered me because I wasn't sexually active then, but now it does. I realized I have NEVER been able to orgasm from physical touching or from just using fingers. I've always needed a vibrator of sorts and this is worrying me for future relationships and stuff with partners. How can I learn to orgasm from touch instead of vibration? I've tried before and have always just gotten frustrated or fallen asleep.

2) I've sorta been curious lately about what it feels like to do the big M using my fingers. I'm uncomfortable doing it though. I can't even use a tampon let alone do THAT with my fingers and I don't have anything that vibrates. What other options do I have?

I've heard through the grapevine that you can get an orgasm through your nipples. Is that true? If it is indeed possible, how would you go about it?

Can a lady actually get in the mood when breastfeeding?

When my girlfriend and I have sex, we almost always (nine times out of ten) orgasm within a few seconds of each other. Honest! This has been happening daily, with the exception of her periods, for about six months. We are both quite satisfied with each other as sexual partners. Are we an unusual couple? Thank you for your time.

I see that in several messages and answers, that reference is made to oral sex accompanied by the use of ice cubes. I'm pretty ignorant about this and would be very grateful to you if you would tell me more about this. My boyfriend and I have a very good sex life and we enjoy making love, but we're also on the look-out for new things to try. I've asked my friends about this and some of them thought it was a joke! Thanks for the help.

My boyfriend has had pain during urination and ejaculation. We have been only with each other for the past year and neither of us have STIs. The info I have found on the internet makes me believe maybe he has urethritis. My question is, can you cause damage to the urethra during oral sex? I don't want to get too personal, so I will leave it alone, but I want to know, can you cause damage due to any force to the urethral opening?

Recently there have been creams for women sold over-the-counter to improve sexual enjoyment for women. Are these lotions safe for women and the men who love them, and do they work? I am familiar with a particular lotion called "Viacreme."

I was wondering about the effects of the birth control pill on orgasms. Any connection? Some friends have told me it makes things easier while some say it makes getting orgasms more difficult. What's the real story?