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Can frequent masturbation affect sexual function?

1) Hi! I have a question about orgasms. I'm a female who has masturbated since her early teens and wonder if I've "overdone" it somewhat. I did it so frequently (sometimes every other day or so; sometimes I waited longer) that now that I'm in my early 20s, I find it harder to reach orgasm, and harder to have multiple orgasms (it used to come so easily to me). Have I "lost" that momentum? Can I regain it if, say, I stopped masturbating for several weeks or months?

Also, my partner stimulates me manually or with his tongue, and I haven't been able to "come" yet... is it because I've masturbated too much? Do women take longer to come? I think he gets bored doing it...

2) My boyfriend has trouble ejaculating, usually taking a long time. I was wondering if it could have to do with his constant masturbation during most of his young life. Could it be that the problem is me? Is there a possibility that we can improve the situation?


What's normal when it comes to wet dreams?

1) Are wet dreams in a sexually active 23-year-old male unusual?

2) I only had about three to four "wet dreams" in my entire life and now I'm 20 years old. I wonder if it is normal, or it's because I masturbate often that I don't have these kinds of dreams. Is there a way of having one like that again?

3) I have a normal sex life with my wife (once or twice a week), but I have been having a problem lately. I have had about four wet dreams last year. I don't know why but I feel really bad about this. Is there something wrong with me? How can I stop this???


Why do I feel guilty after orgasming?

Every time I have an orgasm (alone or with a partner) I have intense feelings of guilt. I was not brought up in a religious household and was never told to "wait until marriage". I've been in long term relationships with all my sexual partners so it's not like I feel guilty for sleeping around. It's getting to the point where I'm not enjoying sex anymore because I dread the feelings I have after an orgasm. Is this normal?


Is male virginity detectable?

1) Simply I want to know (excuse me for my english, but I'm an Italian boy) how a male can be recognized as virgin. My friends say that the frenulum broke when you do for the first time...it's true?

2) I was reading the question about male virginity recognition and got a doubt. Is it possible to detect that a man is virgin of anal sex, i mean, has ever done anal sex?


Can excessive orgasming deplete endorphins?

Since orgasms cause a release of endorphins into one's cerebral-spinal fluid and endorphins are also somewhat responsible for the emotion of happiness, etc., is it possible that excessive masturbation and/or intercourse would lead to a depleted level of endorphins in the system that could in turn cause one's affect to become somewhat "flat"? Could a sustained low level of endorphins in the system induce depression and/or mood disorder?


Is it possible to have orgasms after childbirth?

My wife and I had our first child last July. Until about 3 months ago, she was unable to reach orgasm at all. Of late, she has very small one's, but they don't seem to be getting much better. Prior to having the baby, she had strong, very quick (3-5 minutes) orgasms 90% of the time. I know the stress of being at work rather than home with the baby could play a part in this. Is this common and is there a way to mitigate the problem? 


What should I do with her breasts?

I've been having this problem with my girlfriend. Whenever we make out, I get the impression that she wants me to do something with her breasts... but I don't have the foggiest what to do.

I'm sure that they aren't there strictly for my enjoyment; so, what can I do with my girlfriend that would offer her some pleasure, as well?

I've tried other sources of information, but most other sources either concentrate solely on the vagina, g-spot, and clitoris, or they simply state that breasts are an erogenous zone and leave it at that.


How can I reach orgasm with and without sex toys?

1) I'm not an inexperienced girl at masturbation. I've been doing it for a very long time, but actually only ever discovered what an orgasm was when I was 18 and got my first vibrator. This never bothered me because I wasn't sexually active then, but now it does. I realized I have NEVER been able to orgasm from physical touching or from just using fingers. I've always needed a vibrator of sorts and this is worrying me for future relationships and stuff with partners. How can I learn to orgasm from touch instead of vibration? I've tried before and have always just gotten frustrated or fallen asleep.

2) I've sorta been curious lately about what it feels like to do the big M using my fingers. I'm uncomfortable doing it though. I can't even use a tampon let alone do THAT with my fingers and I don't have anything that vibrates. What other options do I have?


Why does my boyfriend have difficulty orgasming with a condom?

After being on birth control pills for the past two-and-a-half years, I stopped taking them because of side-effects. Since going off the pill, my boyfriend and I have been using condoms with an additional spermicide. The problem is that he is having a difficult time having an orgasm. He says that the condoms do not provide him with enough stimulation to be able to ejaculate. As a result of this dilemma, our sex life has become almost non-existent.

Could it be the type of condoms that we are using? We're using latex condoms. What can we do? Our sex life is riding on this!


What should I do if I'm worried about my sexual inexperience?

I grew up in a religiously conservative family, and now I go to a private Christian college. I will be a junior this year, but I've known since freshman year that the school and the religion just weren't right for me. I love the education, but I'm afraid I'm sexually deprived. When I hear all my friends who go to public school talk about parties and sex, it makes me feel like I'm really missing out. I wanted to transfer, but it just isn't fiscally possible. I'm a very mature person, but I haven't done anything sexual (not even kiss!). The girl to guy ratio at my school is 3:1, and most of the boys are very awkward. I want to experiment, but no one at my school does that. I'm afraid that when I graduate, I still won't have done anything, and no one will want me because I have no experience.


What should I do if I'm a conservative Christian and I'm considering sex before marriage?

I'm a Christian, very conservative in upbringing, and I'm having difficulties in discussing sex in an open and casual manner. I told my male friends that sex should be done within the parameters of marriage. But they told me that I should have a first sexual experience so as to satisfy my wife or maybe a girlfriend (I don't have one yet). Should I follow their opinion regarding this? Should I first know the sexual dynamics of sexual intercourse before doing it with her?

I would appreciate your kind response.

Thank you.


Can you orgasm while exercising?

I'm an athlete, and about a year ago, I purchased one of those ab rollers. One time, I was going through the motions and I experienced an orgasm. Now, it happens about every time I use it. I thought it was extremely weird, but then read where women experience orgasms through lots of things. I was just wondering how it is possible for those feelings to happen just by working out my abs. Also, what are some other weird ways that women have had orgasms? Thanks so much.


Should I come clean about faking orgasms?

I have been in a good relationship for almost four years. My boyfriend is loving and generous and I have good reason to believe this will lead to marriage. (I hope!) The problem is that I have faked orgasm with him since we first started dating. At first I just thought it would be a fling and wanted to be "good in bed." As time went on, I realized this could be the real thing, but by then, it was too late to tell him the truth. It's not his fault — I have never been able to orgasm through intercourse no matter whom I was with or what I tried. I feel sad all the time for lying to him (sometimes he suspects I've faked it, but I still deny it). It just seemed easier to let him believe it because I didn't want to be a frustration to him and he seems so happy when he thinks he has satisfied me. My question is: should I tell him now after almost four years? I think he would be crushed! Maybe he'd be angry that I've lied so much. Maybe I don't want the pressure of having to really come. But I really don't think I can keep this bottled up inside anymore.

Sigh...


What to do when my boyfriend cares more if I cum than I do?

It's very hard for me to orgasm during sex, even if I help myself. I can do it all by my lonesome very quickly, but as soon as I'm with a guy, I just can't cum. However, I'm not worried by this whatsoever. I love sex, and I love everything about it. I love the act of sex, I love pleasuring my partner, I love the sights, smells, and sounds of sex. If I don't cum, meh, I'm still very happy. I'm no happier if I do orgasm during sex.

My problem seems to be keeping my partners happy with my contentment with not orgasming. They seem to think it's their life mission to make me orgasm. I had one boyfriend with whom I actually faked orgasming for a good two years because he was so upset that he couldn't make me cum. Every other partner I've had since then has taken it personally that I can't orgasm with them. It seems to put a bit of strain on my relationships.

I am with a new guy that I care for very deeply. He has been very understanding of my not orgasming, but he seems to try that much harder, and I think he is getting frustrated. I have orgasmed once since we've been together (a mere month and a bit), so it can be done, but I really don't want him to take it personally. I've told him already about this, and he said he was surprised that I'm cool with it. I REALLY don't want him to be disappointed and have this strain our relationship (like every other relationship I've had). I really do like him that much.

What can I do or say to ease his mind?


Why does my boyfriend want to wait till marriage?

My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for a year and a half now. He makes me happy most of the time that we are together! We share almost everything in common. Except one thing, SEX! We have discussed the subject numerous times. He tells me that he loves me very deeply and I tell him that that makes me the happiest woman in the world. However, he says that we should wait until we are married. The problem is that I want to show him my feelings by giving up my virginity to him now, the one true love of my life, and he still says that we should wait.

My question is this: Is he cheating on me, or does he really love me enough to wait until the night of our wedding so that it will be more special?


What should I do if my girlfriend's afraid to have sex?

My girlfriend and I have been going out for more than two years now. I am a first-year student (18 years old) and she is 17. We haven't had sex yet, but during the last year and a half we tried pretty much everything there is besides it. I really feel this is the right time, but when I try to talk to her about it, all she says is that she is afraid. She says it is not that she does not believe in losing virginity before marriage, she is just afraid. I don't want to pressure her, but I just feel that maybe I am not the right person for her or something. What should I do? Thanks.


Does altitude have any impact on sex?

I'm sending you this message from the top of the Sierra Nevada mountains of California. My wife just experienced her best orgasm ever. We live by the beach, a very low altitude... so that made me wonder, although crazy, "Does altitude have any impact on sex?"

If it doesn't impact sex, it definately impacts the lube bottle as it came squirting out on it's own...


What are some tips and tricks for lasting longer during sex?

1) What is the best way to learn how to prolong male orgasm when having intercourse? It seems that I might get thirty seconds of penetration before I blow my top. I'd like it if I could enjoy the situation and add to my partner's pleasure by helping her orgasm.

2) I just wrote asking about how I might prolong my orgasm so that my girlfriend might be able to reach hers. I've read through your archives extensively, so I've seen all the "orgasm is personal and shouldn't be concentrated on" so I've seen that and whatever. I just want one issue discussed: how to prolong MYSELF to please her. I'm looking for answers such as: exercises, workouts, diets, surgery (jk). Please help me please her.


Why am I having trouble ejaculating?

1) I am a 20 year old male. My problem is that I have never ejaculated. I have no problem getting and maintaining an erection, but it seems as though I cannot ejaculate. If I masturbate for about ten minutes, my toes begin to become numb at a peak time. I have had several wet dreams, which I assume are semen. I also read an article where when passing a bowel movement, sometimes semen can come out of the penis. This happens for me as well. Do I have a serious problem? Eventually, I want to have children, and I am wondering if this could stop that. Thank You.

2) I don't know what to do! My boyfriend has no trouble becoming sexually aroused around me, but when we try to have sex, he just doesn't seem to be able to actually have an orgasm and ejaculate. He only has had one with hand stimulation when hand cream is involved, but not otherwise. Oral sex does not even work. This is very frustrating; he tells me it's his fault but I feel like it's mine. Plus, he says he didn't have as much trouble with his past girlfriends, but that he cares about me so much more than them. I'm really confused. Is there anything either one of us can do?


Is there an anti-anxiety treatment that doesn't have sexual side effects?

My girlfriend has recently started taking Paxil for anxiety that she has suffered from since she was young! Paxil works great for her anxiety; however, she has gone from being multi-orgasmic to being unable to orgasm at all! My question is, "is there an anti-anxiety treatment med or otherwise that doesn't have the sexual side effects?" Please help!!


Can you get pregnant within two weeks of having an abortion?

Can you get pregnant within 2 weeks after having an abortion if you had unprotected outercourse? It is exactly 1 month since my abortion and I have not had my period. I did a home pregnancy test 12 days after being intimate and it was negative. There was no intercourse or anal sex. When do you get your period after an abortion — is it 4 - 6 weeks? My boyfriend is not aware I had abortion as he would have never allowed it and he was a bit suspicious when I wouldn't allow him to go in me. So he ejaculated behind me. I not sure if it was near my vagina.


What is pre-orgasmic?

1) I know this may seem like a strange question, but what exactly IS pre-orgasmic? Does it mean that a person hasn't yet had an orgasm, or that her body isn't ready yet? I remember reading in one of your answers that many women under the age of twenty are pre-orgasmic. Why is this? Also, what is/are the purpose(s) (besides pleasure) of orgasm in women?

2) Hi, I'm not from the USA, so you may call me "the foreigner boy." I'm a 20-year-old male... I have had a lovely, nice, 19-year-old girlfriend for the past two years and I love her very much! We've started making love after six months of being together. We’ve had oral sex since the very beginning of the relationship. My girlfriend was a virgin before we met and me too. The problem is this: She never reaches orgasm! We really did try it all... it's very disturbing because she doesn't understand why I think it’s a BIG DEAL! And I really want her to have orgasms, but she just can't reach it... We really did try it ALL!

She tried to masturbate alone a few times and still had the same feeling... It’s not that she doesn't have fun, but she never really reaches the Peak! It seems as if she is stopping herself from having orgasm. Any secret I haven't read or heard about could be helpful! Thank you for your time!


What's the difference between a vaginal and clitoral orgasm?

What's the difference between a vaginal and clitoral orgasm? Is it only possible to have a vaginal orgasm during intercourse? If you can have a clitoral orgasm through other activity, but not intercourse, why is that? If your clitoris is stimulated during intercourse, will that give you a clitoral orgasm during sex? So how do you have a vaginal one? Can you have both at the same time?


How do I French kiss?

1) Hey, okay, well I french kissed this guy and I didn't use my tongue. Are girls supposed to use their tongues? If so, which way does it go??

2) I have never really frenched a guy!! I have kissed like open mouth but not french. I was reading an article the other day in a mag (embarrassing moments) and this girl forgot to swallow her spit and when they pulled away it was like a big line of spit forming from both of their mouths. I was wondering if they were inexperienced or if they just forgot to swallow. I also have another question. My friend is going out with this guy and he always clanks teeth and bites her tongue and I'm hoping I won't be like that. How can you prevent it? Thank you so much.