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Can I preserve my fertility?

I've heard so many horror stories of women who wait until their mid-thirties or later to have children, then find out that they are infertile. I'm 25 years old now and nowhere near getting married or having babies, yet I don't want this to happen to me when I'm ready. What can I do now to protect my fertility and make sure I am able to conceive when the time is right? It's causing me a lot of anxiety!!


What's the process for egg donation and is it safe?

1) I have seen multiple advertisements for egg donation in my school's newspaper. I could sell my eggs for $25,000 or more! That's a year of tuition! There's got to be a catch. When I do some research to find out the procedure and the risks, I only seem to find oocyte donation "businesses" — not the most straight forward sources on the subject. Alice, I trust you! Can you tell me... what have I got to lose?

2) I see lots of ads in the paper here at my school about egg donors wanted. I think that I would like to donate an egg, but I can't find any information on the net about donating — only about receiving a donation. Can you tell me what the process is like, how long it takes, and whether there are side effects or permanent long-term effects? Or point me towards some other resource.


Is hypnosis an effective form of therapy?

What is your opinion about hypnosis? Is it dangerous? Does it really work? I have a few issues about my personality that I would like to work on and the more I read about hypnosis, the more I think this is what I need. It almost sounds like magic to me. Would this kind of therapy help me with my many problems such as: self-confidence, communication problems, control of my emotions, sexual intercourse pain, etc.? As you see, I have quite a few things to work on and I really hope that hypnosis will help me. However, I wanted to get your opinion about it before I go ahead and do it. Thank you very much for your wise advice.


How can I stop being so emotionally sensitive?

As a 21 year old, I recognize that I'm far from being completely emotionally developed. But, I also recognize that I'm way behind others my age. I think I am too emotionally sensitive. Things people say or do really affect me. Whether I care about the person or not, I always have extreme emotional episodes after others express their feelings or opinions about me. If what they express is derogatory, I get very upset. If it's positive, I get very happy. And, I absolutely cannot deal with rejection. I want to be able to just ignore what others think and just deal with what I think. How can I achieve that goal?


How do I tell my girlfriend I'm sterile?

I am an 18-year-old male. And I lost my ability to reproduce in a bull riding accident at a rodeo I competed in about two years ago. I would like to father children more than anything. And now I have a girlfriend who is talking of wanting to have kids in the future. But I can't bring myself to tell her that I can't because I still haven't dealt with the problem of coping with it myself. I need to know how to deal with the fact I cannot have kids, especially now that my significant other wants them, but is ignorant to the fact that I am sterile. Please help me ASAP! This is tearing me apart.


Can I go off and on birth control pills on my own?

I've been on birth control pills for eight years and I'm thinking about trying a few months off them. They were prescribed when I was pretty young because of very irregular periods. I also was involved in a monogamous relationship for a number of years, so they were convenient. Now I have no steady partner, and am really curious to see how I feel without taking these pills. Would it be ok to go off them at the end of my pill pack or should I consult someone at health services first? If I go off for a few months and my periods are as horrendous as they were when I was younger, would it be safe to start up again on my own (I usually just see someone once per year for pill checks)?


What is my risk of postpartum depression as a mom-to-be with social anxiety disorder?

I'm an anxious person. My clinical diagnosis is social anxiety disorder, but I have anxiety in many other situations and a couple of phobias to boot. I've seen therapists on and off for the past 20 years and have been on multiple SSRIs (I am off of anti-anxiety medications currently). I manage my anxiety with plenty of exercise, sleep, and relaxation exercises, but mostly I just accept that this is the way I am. My husband and I are starting a family soon, and my new worry is post-partum depression or anxiety. If I'm already moody, will the hormones and stresses of pregnancy drive me completely crazy? Does having a history of mental illness put me at a greater risk for developing a disorder like post-partum depression? Thanks for your help!


When should I take a pregnancy test if I have a late period?

My period is late this month, and I'm afraid that I may be pregnant. The weird thing is, though, my partner and I never actually had actual sexual intercourse (in other words, there was no penetration). I'm wondering if the wet environment could still be a risk. I'm hoping that it's due to stress and fatigue with finals coming on that causing this delay. How long should I wait before getting tested?


Is it normal to spot with a NuvaRing?

I have been on the Nuvaring for three months now, and I am keeping it in for the four weeks then changing it because my doctor said there's no need for me to have a period. About two weeks ago I started having dark brown discharge and it has gotten more heavy, but only when I run or stand up real quick. Is this normal or should I call my doctor and find out what is going on?


Is Mirena safe for those who have yet to give birth?

I have recently been advised that my on-going migraines might be caused and/or increased by the use of contraceptives containing estrogen. To that end, I have been recommended to switch to a progesterone-only form of birth control. Which, in turn, basically means I get to choose between Implanon and Mirena (I really can't stand needles, so Depo is out for me!). I am only 23 years old, and have not yet started a family. I do want to have children someday, and am very enticed by the idea of Mirena lasting to the point when I might want to begin trying to get pregnant. However, all of the advertisements for Mirena state that ideal candidates have already had children.

Is Mirena still safe for use in women who have not yet given birth? If so are there any additional side effects to consider in this instance?


Is it possible to have orgasms after childbirth?

My wife and I had our first child last July. Until about 3 months ago, she was unable to reach orgasm at all. Of late, she has very small one's, but they don't seem to be getting much better. Prior to having the baby, she had strong, very quick (3-5 minutes) orgasms 90% of the time. I know the stress of being at work rather than home with the baby could play a part in this. Is this common and is there a way to mitigate the problem? 


How can I stop seeking sexual attention?

I am afraid my need for sexual attention is getting out of hand. The past several weekends I have wound up kissing guys in bars, and I find myself less interested in flirting or having interesting conversations with them than I am in getting that rush of meeting someone new. This weekend I had sex with a guy I had just met in a bar and I have no idea why. Making matters worse is that he was much younger than I am and I don't think we had anything in common whatsoever. I feel like I am devaluing myself and I don't want to lose my self-respect. How can I find the cause of my behavior and how can I stop?


What are the health effects of only having one ovary?

I'm a 19-year-old female. I had my right ovary removed (oophorectomy) three years ago due to a very large ovarian cyst. I was assured by my gynecologist that I'm still capable of bearing children but wasn't informed thoroughly of all of the pros and cons in regards to this type of operation (e.g., can the estrogen loss have any negative physical affects?). If you could shed some light on this matter, it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.


What's polycystic ovary syndrome?

1) This is in reference to your Missed periods Q&A. Another cause of missed or late periods is PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome). A lot of health care providers don't seem to be aware of this syndrome. In this syndrome, missed or irregular periods are caused by unusual hormone levels, sometimes in combination with insulin intolerance. Because missed and irregular periods cause scar tissue build-up in the uterus (which may cause endometrial cancer) and may cause infertility, it is important that your readers know to ask their health care provider about this syndrome. There are obviously other symptoms and complications, but I just thought that I might mention it to you so that you might read up on it for your readers. Thank you.

2) I was recently diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). I'm only 17 and am afraid that this will affect my chance of having children. Should I worry? Also, I know birth control pills will help me regulate my period, but if I take them, will it stop the effects PCOS has on me? Like me gaining rapid weight, missed periods, and losing my hair? This is really worrying me. Can you inform me on this syndrome?


If I'm recovering from anorexia, when should I expect to get my period back?

I was anorexic for three years and I have been in recovery for two. At the moment, I am doing well. I have a healthy weight, I eat a balanced diet, I work out regularly though not excessively, and I feel good. However, I haven't had my period in about three years now. I had been told it would come back once I reached a healthy weight, but so far, no deal, even though I've been at this weight for over a year now.

Before I became anorexic, I did get my period regularly. I am 23 years old. I am taking a calcium supplement daily to prevent osteoporosis, but I would feel more comfortable if I did get my period again. What is going on? How worried should I be? Should I go see a doctor? What can I do about this?


If I don't take birth control pills at exactly the same time am I unprotected?

I have two questions, first: On my birth control pill box instructions it says to take a pill each day at ABOUT the same time. I was wondering, does this mean that I should set an alarm to make sure I take it the exact minute every day (which is what I've been doing) or can I take it within a couple of hours difference if I decide to sleep in on Saturday?

Secondly: My doctor told me that if I miss a pill to consider myself unprotected for that month. However, after I left I realized that in biology class we learned that a ovum (or egg) can only survive a few days inside the fallopian tubes and uterus and then it get absorbed into the body (or dies). If I missed a pill then wouldn't I only be unprotected for the next couple of days (if an egg was produced in the 24 hr period that I didn't take the pill) instead of the whole month?


Can lowered testosterone levels in women reduce sex drive?

Do you have any information on the effects of low testosterone concerning sexual desire in women? After I got pregnant, I have had a significant drop in sexual desire and think it could be related to low testosterone. Any info on the subject? By the way, this problem had nothing to do with stress, marital problems, or the baby. Everything in my life is great except I lost my sexual desire and want to get it back. THANKS.


What should I do if I'm pregnant where abortion isn't legal?

I am really nervous because my period is a week late so far and I am studying abroad in Egypt. I really don't know who to talk to about this. Premarital sex is a big taboo, abortion is illegal, and I can't even find a pregnancy test at a pharmacy. What should I do? I can't come back to the U.S. with a big belly — I can't tell my family! I am so afraid! I left the U.S. a month ago (my partner is still there). I read that jetlag can influence your menstrual cycle, as can weight gain or loss. I was jetlagged, but my weight is more or less the same (except I am eating more rice and oil than I do normally). Could diet change your cycle? Anyway, I guess my main question is, what should you do if you find out you are pregnant in a conservative country where abortion is illegal and don't have enough money to fly home and back? Thanks.


What should I do if I'm pregnant and undecided?

I am nineteen-years-old. I just found out that I'm pregnant. I have been with the guy for two years and in college for one year. We are not financially stable. We have given it a lot of thought, but still do not know what to do. I have looked at the pros and cons and still I'm not sure. I have three little sisters and know that raising children is a hard job. Throughout this time I have leaned more toward the abortion, but don't feel like I know enough about it. Can you please HELP?


Do mumps and swollen testes affect fertility?

I have a question about mumps: I had mumps while I was thirteen-years-old. I remembered that because of embarrassment. I was afraid to tell my parents about the inflammation (swelling of the testicles) at the same time I had mumps. I did not have treatment for the swelling of my testicles due to mumps. Later, the swelling went away about the same time as my mumps. Although I still can produce semen, I am deeply disturbed whether that swelling could have hindered my fertility (i.e., no production of sperm due to the blockage of the sperm channels).


How to gain weight while recovering from bulimia?

I was bulimic for about four or five months and went from 5'6.5" at 115 pounds to 95 pounds. I have not told anyone, and will not, so please don't ask me to, but I am back up to 110 to 112 pounds and pretty much graze throughout the day so I don't throw up. I mostly snack on white bread, fruit, potatoes, and cereal in large portions, but want to stop and eat a healthy, more balanced diet. The problem is, I am not sure what a healthy weight should be. Charts say I am too skinny, but I don't believe it because I know girls in the media are thinner than me and they seem fine. I want to be as small a weight as possible without being unhealthy. I skipped my period for three months but did get it in January. I have not lost any weight since then though, and I should have gotten my period about a week ago but didn't. I don't understand, it is so confusing, can you help me?


Why do I, as a man, have womenly hips?

I'm a man who has been teased about the shape of his body!! How is it a man in his 20s, who is physically in great shape, has "women's" hips? I asked my doctor and he said a bunch of mumbo jumbo. They are in exact proportion to a woman sized 12 (waist, too). My wife doesn't mind it, but it really bothers me! The only thing you tell that I wasn't a woman is the fact I don't talk that high and also the breast issue (not having them).


How can I control my body hair?

I'm only 18, but I have a lot of hair on my chest. I'm afraid of letting women see me with my shirt off because I don't want them to be turned off. How can I get rid of this rug and keep it under control without shaving daily? Also, is there away to slow down my beard growth? Shaving more than once a day can be very irritating to my face, but I hate looking so dirty.


How can I improve my self-esteem?

Do you have some advice for someone suffering from low self-esteem? Some things that I struggle with: comparison of myself to others ("She is so "together!" Why am I not like that? What is lacking in me that makes her better?"), lack of faith in my abilities ("I'll never be as good as him at that — I might as well not try."), lots of self-criticizing ("Why did I sign up for this class — I should have known I couldn't handle it."), always saying yes to people or feeling like I've said the wrong thing... you get the idea. I've been feeling pretty unmotivated lately too, and I think this just adds to the problem. Can you give some advice, dear Alice?


Can I shrink my large nipples?

I am an eighteen-year-old male and I have had an embarrassing problem my entire life. My nipples are rather large and round. I'm not fat, and the rest of my body looks normal, but my nipples protrude and look very strange. I have spent much time doing every chest exercise imaginable, and although my chest muscles seem to grow, my nipples just get pushed out further. This has been a source of insecurity for me for a very long time. I am ashamed to take off my shirt in front of others. I really think that my nipples are the only thing keeping me from having a nice body. Is there anything that can be done to correct this problem?


How do I find out about college parties?

I am a freshman who has just moved into the "social dorm." It's only been a few days, but I already feel like my place in the social strata is being cemented — I'm somewhat overweight, and although I can be very talkative and can force myself to make the effort to meet people despite being nervous, I feel like I'm already being classed as one of the straight-edge less popular types. I don't mind that I'm not the type who makes 500 friends instantly; I'm still managing to make a few good acquaintances/potential friends.

The problem is that the people I make friends with aren't really the party types, and while I'm not a huge party person either, I still want to get to go to some and have the whole "college experience." How is it that other people are "in the know" about parties and stuff like, as soon as they get here? What are the qualities that make them seem to bond so instantly? How do I get myself invited to at least some of these events?? I don't want to crash the parties and show up alone...


What can I do if I'm intimidated by my incredibly intelligent partner?

I have just entered into my first real relationship with a guy that I really like. The problem is, he's incredibly bright. So much so that it intimidates me a little. He doesn't brag or make me feel unintelligent (and I know I'm not), it's just a part of who he is. He cares a lot about me, but I want to feel that our relationship is more than physical. I've always valued intelligence, and I really enjoy being with this guy, but there is an aspect of him that I'm not able to be a part of. Thanks for your help.