I'm a Christian, very conservative in upbringing, and I'm having difficulties in discussing sex in an open and casual manner. I told my male friends that sex should be done within the parameters of marriage. But they told me that I should have a first sexual experience so as to satisfy my wife or maybe a girlfriend (I don't have one yet). Should I follow their opinion regarding this? Should I first know the sexual dynamics of sexual intercourse before doing it with her?

I would appreciate your kind response.

Thank you.

I recently told my girlfriend I have herpes. Since that night I can feel her moving emotionally away from me. What can I tell her to comfort her and continue moving forward in our relationship?

I am in a long distance relationship and my girlfriend recently admitted that she had cheated on me. She said, and I believe her, that she really loves me and that this was a mistake she regrets. However, I can't take it out of my mind and forget about it. I am angry that she ruined the purity of our love story. It feels like it's no longer "a dream come true" — merely a watered down version of it because it is no longer "flawless." I feel like a pushover for not doing anything about it. (I'm really in love with her and I can't bring myself to break up just for that.) How can I forgive her? Will I always keep these poisonous thought inside? How can I prevent this from shadowing every aspect of our relationship? Am I "selling short" and blind to her untrustworthiness? How can I trust her again?

I have a friend who recently came out of the closet, and now he's very involved in his college GLSBT (not sure if I have the letters right) community. My question is this: He has now, as a matter of pride and fun, I think, become involved in drag shows. He looks pretty good as a woman, if I do say so, but I just don't get it. What's the point of drag? Why do gay men do it? It's especially confusing for me because I don't hear of lesbian women dressing up as men, or at least not as much, and it's not a "spectacle" like drag shows are. I'm just confused — what exactly is drag FOR?

When I came to Columbia, my roommate and I got along really well. We still do. However, three weeks into the year, I learned that he is gay. I have no problems with this, I'd like to think that I'm open-minded — but can you give me some advice on how to handle this relationship?

What do I do about a man who no longer kisses me during sex? We still have sex on a regular basis, but he no longer looks at me while we have sex. He always covers his face when we are together. It has been months since he has kissed me. I am starving for affection. I happen to be in love with this man.

I was looking through your column and thought that I should ask your advice on a rather sensitive matter. I recently invited a guy over for dinner at my house. We had a great time together, yet he presumed that he was going to sleep with me and insisted that I had led him on during the main course of the evening. I do not see how this is possible, but this guy keeps on hassling me for sex and I do not want to lose him as a friend, but I really do not see him as a sexual partner. What should I do?