Should I come out as bi and tell my friend I’m interested in them?

1) I am a 19 year old female, and I am bisexual. I haven't come out of the closet yet, but I have told one really trustworthy friend. I am really afraid to come out of the closet because I know that my family will never accept it. That and one of my friends, I sort of like but I would never do anything to make her feel uncomfortable. So I haven't told her yet either. What do I do? I hate this whole being in the middle thing. She is really a great person and I can totally understand if she doesn't have the same feelings I do about her but I would really like to tell her the way I feel with out ruining our friendship if I did tell her. I know it's a rock and a hard place but do you have any advice for me? It would really be appreciated.

2) I'm an eighteen-year-old male. I'm beginning to become good friends with a guy, but I'm also feeling that I want something beyond friendship with him. I know that I'm bi, but I have never expressed it to anyone. I guess I fear the social implications of it, but then again I am a very liberal person. I can't stop thinking of this guy, not necessarily in a sexual way, but in a "relationship" context. He isn't dating anyone, but I have no idea if he is bi/gay or straight (he hasn't made any announcements, but he seems to be "playing it straight" as I am).

What should I do? I don't want to destroy a potential friendship by approaching him about this. But, I've never felt this way about anyone (male or female) and I don't want to let a potential opportunity slip by and be miserable. I'd also rather keep my sexuality a private thing, but I do think I can trust him.


What should I do to avoid getting an erection during a massage?

I'm a thirty-something man who has a happy but often stressful life. I'd like to get a massage every now and then, but I'm worried about what might happen when I'm virtually naked and being rubbed all over by another person. In other words, I'm worried about getting an erection during a massage. It seems like there would be no way to hide it.

How do I deal with this? How do masseuses deal with this when it happens? Do they expect their male clients to get aroused? Would they think I'm perverted when I'm lying on the table and standing at attention?


How can I put on a condom if I can't retract my foreskin when I'm erect?

I believe I have a mild case of phimosis. When my penis is not erect, I can retract my foreskin all the way back to reveal the glans. However, when I have a full erection, it is impossible to retract the foreskin to that extent. I can only retract it to reveal the slit and top part of the penis. Due to this problem, I have a question about condom use. I'm still a virgin, so I have never experienced intercourse using a condom. When I read the instructions on how to use a condom, they almost always instruct you to retract the foreskin completely if you are not circumcised. Since I cannot retract the foreskin while erect, is it still possible to use a condom without retracting the foreskin, and will this complication affect slippage of the condom or sensation problems during intercourse? On a side note, why is it recommended to retract the foreskin fully before putting on the condom? Thank you in advance.


What's the difference between fluid during arousal and discharge?

This might sound like a gross question, but I do need an answer! When my partner performs oral sex on me, I'm not sure if my vagina is moist because I'm wet or because I have vaginal discharge... which is what? Isn't it normal for a woman's vagina to be somewhat moist, and to have a little discharge? When a woman gets wet, how can she tell? And know the difference between that and discharge?

Also, my partner and I haven't tried intercourse yet (I am a virgin)... I've read your previous answer to a man who said his penis might be too big for his partner; I am worried that I'm too small/tight for my partner. It doesn't look easy for him to even enter, and I don't know how I can make my opening wider to accommodate him (how much foreplay, how long?). How much pain does the woman feel? Thanks a lot!!


Why am I depressed as I navigate my sexuality?

Thank you for everything, and it is being appreciated by thousands. I have read all your advice to others and have learned a lot. However, I have a problem that I do not know how to handle. It started when I decided to turn myself around from being bisexual to straight (nobody knew what I was, except my best friend, who is also bisexual). I now have a big hole inside me that is being filled by the dark things of life (such as hatred). I had good qualities, such as a great personality, being open-minded, and I would rather go through life without it than turn back to the "bad" habits (please do not get me wrong, I will never judge gays for I have been close to being one). Please help me to fill the hole with life, to get back or improve on my qualities, and to gain the knowledge to approach and attract someone of the opposite sex. And one last thing, do you think it is wise to let my future girlfriend know what I used to be?