What are some tips and tricks for lasting longer during sex?

1) What is the best way to learn how to prolong male orgasm when having intercourse? It seems that I might get thirty seconds of penetration before I blow my top. I'd like it if I could enjoy the situation and add to my partner's pleasure by helping her orgasm.

2) I just wrote asking about how I might prolong my orgasm so that my girlfriend might be able to reach hers. I've read through your archives extensively, so I've seen all the "orgasm is personal and shouldn't be concentrated on" so I've seen that and whatever. I just want one issue discussed: how to prolong MYSELF to please her. I'm looking for answers such as: exercises, workouts, diets, surgery (jk). Please help me please her.


What are sexual positions people with disabilities can try?

I have been dating this guy for ten years. We both have physical disabilities and therefore have very limited movement. However, we have complete sensation. We really want to have sex but are having difficulty with positioning. Since I have a little more movement than him, I am going to be the one who does most of it. We have had two very unsuccessful attempts and are getting very discouraged. We really love another, but are losing hope. Any ideas?


How long should I wait to use Viagra after using poppers?

I know that it is extremely dangerous to mix viagra (or other ED drugs) and poppers (amyl nitrate), and that one should wait for 24 hours after using viagra (to let it get out of your system) before using poppers. My question is what is the waiting period after using poppers before it is safe to use viagra? In other words, how long before the physiological effects of poppers wear off?


Why am I having trouble ejaculating?

1) I am a 20 year old male. My problem is that I have never ejaculated. I have no problem getting and maintaining an erection, but it seems as though I cannot ejaculate. If I masturbate for about ten minutes, my toes begin to become numb at a peak time. I have had several wet dreams, which I assume are semen. I also read an article where when passing a bowel movement, sometimes semen can come out of the penis. This happens for me as well. Do I have a serious problem? Eventually, I want to have children, and I am wondering if this could stop that. Thank You.

2) I don't know what to do! My boyfriend has no trouble becoming sexually aroused around me, but when we try to have sex, he just doesn't seem to be able to actually have an orgasm and ejaculate. He only has had one with hand stimulation when hand cream is involved, but not otherwise. Oral sex does not even work. This is very frustrating; he tells me it's his fault but I feel like it's mine. Plus, he says he didn't have as much trouble with his past girlfriends, but that he cares about me so much more than them. I'm really confused. Is there anything either one of us can do?


How can I tighten my loose vagina?

I have given birth to three children. My last child was delivered without an episiotomy. I have noticed a change in the size of my vagina as a result of this. I am too embarrassed to have sex because I feel too loose. Is this common with multiple childbirths? I am too ashamed to ask anyone this. Please let me know if there is something that can be done to repair my womanhood.


Do I have bulimia and will it interfere with my birth control pills?

Once a day, after meals — whenever my roommate isn't around, I stick my fingers down my throat and throw up most of the food that I had just eaten. I do not binge — I only purge. I understand from my Psychology professor that the diagnosis of bulimia nervosa requires that the person binge and then purge. I am curious, then, what I have — do I have a form of anorexia nervosa or what? Also, I am on birth control pills and I am afraid that I might hurt their effect by throwing up. How long does it take for the pill to get absorbed into my system? I usually don't throw up until about 5 or six hours after I have taken the pill. Will this hurt the effect of the pill?


What's the white stuff on my vulva?

I've been wondering about the white stuff that is occasionally found in between my labia majora and labia minora... I do NOT have any STDs (I tested) and am assuming it's dried urine...

I want to get rid of this white stuff because it looks and smells bad as if I have STDs when I have oral sex. Is there any way to prevent getting this white stuff?


Is there an anti-anxiety treatment that doesn't have sexual side effects?

My girlfriend has recently started taking Paxil for anxiety that she has suffered from since she was young! Paxil works great for her anxiety; however, she has gone from being multi-orgasmic to being unable to orgasm at all! My question is, "is there an anti-anxiety treatment med or otherwise that doesn't have the sexual side effects?" Please help!!


Where can I find basic information about emergency contraception?

1) My girlfriend and I had sex twice one night — the second time, we had to change condoms because she was dry and the lubricant had run out. Before I put the second condom on, she asked me to "put it in" without it on for a few seconds; which I did — not entirely all the way though. I instantly realized the mistake and withdrew. Naturally, as I expect, there is a small chance this could have gotten her pregnant. However, this was four days after her period ended, and the condoms we were using had nonoxynol-9 on the inside and outside. I had not ejaculated yet, as a matter of fact, I never did... and I had wiped the tip of my penis prior to doing this to avoid any pre-cum. My question is this: I'm hoping I'm right in assuming the chance of pregnancy is minimal — however, we are considering emergency contraception. What could you suggest?

2) My boyfriend and I had sex last night and we saw that the condom had broke. We don't know when it happened and I've been looking all over for the 72 hour correction thing that the commercials say — just in case. Can you help me?


Can I reschedule my period?

This may seem a ridiculous question, but here goes. I have a trip planned to Hawaii and just realized that during my vacation time, I am scheduled to be on my period. Needless to say, that will definitely slow down my plans for ocean swimming and loads of tropical sex with my boyfriend. Is there a way to safely alter my cycle by missing birth control pills or other means?


Can you get pregnant within two weeks of having an abortion?

Can you get pregnant within 2 weeks after having an abortion if you had unprotected outercourse? It is exactly 1 month since my abortion and I have not had my period. I did a home pregnancy test 12 days after being intimate and it was negative. There was no intercourse or anal sex. When do you get your period after an abortion — is it 4 - 6 weeks? My boyfriend is not aware I had abortion as he would have never allowed it and he was a bit suspicious when I wouldn't allow him to go in me. So he ejaculated behind me. I not sure if it was near my vagina.


Does ingesting semen have a laxative effect?

1) I have asked this question to many sites with no response, but came (sorry:) ) upon your site which seems to be willing to post just about any question and answer them too, so here goes:

Is there a laxative effect of ingested ejaculate, or is it ALL in my head (oh gosh, another one :) )? I have found that when I ingest my own ejaculate, almost invariably within a matter of a few minutes, I have loose bowels.

2) My boyfriend and I have been exploring oral sex for a couple months — but I've only just noticed that when I swallow I seem to experience a bout of diarrhea within a couple hours of doing so. Is it normal to have diarrhea from swallowing ejaculate?


Do I tell my boyfriend that I have male and female genitalia?

Okay, I think this is really embarrassing, but I have a vagina and testicles. I'm too ashamed to go and talk to anyone about it. My mom always asks me if I'm okay with it, but last time she did, I just ran away. I'm so upset, and I haven't told any of my friends because I know they would make fun of me. I just don't know what to do; I have a long term boyfriend and he always wonders why I won't show him my body. I was thinking about having sexual intercourse with him, but I know he would not want to have anything to do with me after he finds out. I'm not sure if I'm a man or a woman.


What's the deal with ovarian cysts?

1) What are ovarian cysts? What do they feel like, and where would one feel the symptoms?

2) I just found out that I have a small cyst on my left ovary. I was wondering what causes these? Any risks with them? The doctor told me that they usually pass during a monthly period but I've been having this pain for several months already. Any advice? I haven't seen my GYN about this yet.

3) Both me and my husband are at Columbia University. I was recently diagnosed with ovarian functional cysts that are about one inch long each, in both ovaries. We are starting to think about having a baby. Do you think that having those cysts in my ovaries would decrease my chances of becoming pregnant? Thank you very much for your response.


Can our relationship survive summer break if we haven't had sex yet?

I am a 19-year-old college student and am seriously involved with my boyfriend who is a 20-year-old college student. We have even talked of getting married someday. Our relationship is very close and we talk about everything, and he is very wonderful and supportive. I feel very committed to him and would really like to have sex with him. We have tried twice, but it hasn't really worked out because my vagina is too tight. I am pretty sure the problem is just that it needs to be stretched more, because I have been to the gynecologist and don't have any infections. He says that he is okay with whatever we do and that he loves me no matter what, but I still feel guilty about not being able to go all the way. How do I get over this guilt? I will be leaving college for the summer soon and we will be separated for awhile and I want to make sure that our relationship is as solid as possible before I leave so we have the absolute best chances of surviving the summer!


How do I define my sexuality and tell my parents about my transgender partner?

I am a girl, in love with a transgender guy. He was born with the wrong parts, but is truly the kindest person I have ever met. I love him very much, but I am afraid to tell my parents. "Adam" may have been born a female, but he is now a male, and is planing on getting surgery to prove it. My parents are Christians, and I'm not sure they will approve of him. Does me liking Adam, and female to male transgender people, make me a lesbian? Or bi-sexual? My parents deeply disagree with these things and I am afraid to talk to them about Adam.


How may having spina bifida affect sex?

1) I'm 20 years old. I have spina bifida and I can walk perfectly normal but I have incontinence with my bladder. I get a lot of urinary tract infections, too. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. I am kind of worried about having sex with him because I always pee myself. I was wondering what I should do to stop getting these infections so I get be comfortable during sex and not have to think that I will pee on the bed.

2) I have been friends with a guy who has spina bifida for a while now, and recently, things took a turn for the better — we are just starting a relationship. I know that he has sensation below his waist, and can get an erection, but I wondered if there is anything about how his disability will affect our sex life. I am anxious for it to be pleasing for both of us, and although we are open enough for me to ask him questions, I would like to go in prepared so to speak! Is there anything that will be able to help me in making sure that the first time for us won't be awkward, uncomfortable or downright crap?!


How do I communicate that I’m about to ejaculate during oral sex?

I tried looking through all of the letters, and even tried searching, but I didn't see anything pertaining to this:

I've never had a blow job, but would like one...some day...:) I was wondering, if, when you peak, if it's acceptable to just let yourself cum inside the person's mouth? Should you give a warning? Should you attempt to restrain from it?

I realize this question may sound rather juvenile, but who else can I turn to?


What is pre-orgasmic?

1) I know this may seem like a strange question, but what exactly IS pre-orgasmic? Does it mean that a person hasn't yet had an orgasm, or that her body isn't ready yet? I remember reading in one of your answers that many women under the age of twenty are pre-orgasmic. Why is this? Also, what is/are the purpose(s) (besides pleasure) of orgasm in women?

2) Hi, I'm not from the USA, so you may call me "the foreigner boy." I'm a 20-year-old male... I have had a lovely, nice, 19-year-old girlfriend for the past two years and I love her very much! We've started making love after six months of being together. We’ve had oral sex since the very beginning of the relationship. My girlfriend was a virgin before we met and me too. The problem is this: She never reaches orgasm! We really did try it all... it's very disturbing because she doesn't understand why I think it’s a BIG DEAL! And I really want her to have orgasms, but she just can't reach it... We really did try it ALL!

She tried to masturbate alone a few times and still had the same feeling... It’s not that she doesn't have fun, but she never really reaches the Peak! It seems as if she is stopping herself from having orgasm. Any secret I haven't read or heard about could be helpful! Thank you for your time!


What's the difference between a vaginal and clitoral orgasm?

What's the difference between a vaginal and clitoral orgasm? Is it only possible to have a vaginal orgasm during intercourse? If you can have a clitoral orgasm through other activity, but not intercourse, why is that? If your clitoris is stimulated during intercourse, will that give you a clitoral orgasm during sex? So how do you have a vaginal one? Can you have both at the same time?


Why do I experience pain after masturbating at night?

Sometimes I masturbate before I go to sleep at night. Usually nothing is wrong, but sometimes (and this always occurs at night, I've found) after I masturbate, a few minutes later I have to urinate. And when I do, it is usually very painful. The feeling doesn't pass either. My scrotum usually gets very tightened up, and there is painful feeling above my crotch. Usually I just sit there, drink some water until the feeling goes away. ANY idea what this is?


Where can I find the birth control sponge and what’s the efficacy rate?

1) I've always used condoms combined with a sponge for birth control. That worked well because if anything happened with the condom, there was always a backup — it made me feel safer. Then I get to New York, I go into three drug stores, and none of them have sponges. Now what? I don't want to rely on just condoms, I don't want to take pills because the whole hormone thing is rather frightening, and a doctor said that diaphragms make you more prone to get urinary tract infections, which I get frequently. So what am I supposed to do? What's up with this total absence of sponges?

2) In exploring other forms of contraception, what is the reliability rate of the "sponge"?


Are there any nutritional benefits to swallowing semen?

1) I'm worried. What happens if you eat your own sperm?

2) Today a girlfriend and I were discussing the nutritional value of sperm. While performing oral sex, if you swallow, I was told that it is very high in protein. However, I was also informed that it is very high in calories. This may seem like a weird question, but I would like to know what nutritional benefits are involved when "swallowing" and how many approximate calories are in a man's ejaculation? Thank you for your help in this matter.


Why do I get a yeast infection every time I have my period?

I am a 26-year-old female and have started getting a yeast infection every month without fail at the end of my period. This started about a year ago and I've cut back on eating bread, I don't eat much sugar and I rarely drink beer. I read online that someone recommended using a douche just before and after starting my period. Is this a reasonable thing to try? I've always been very opposed to douching but I'm sick of the itching and don't want to have to take medication or use cream every month. Any suggestions?


Is it possible to pass drugs through semen during oral sex?

I recently performed oral sex on a guy who had been using crack cocaine. He had been using for about three days straight. When he climaxed, I swallowed his semen and about ten minutes later, I felt very dizzy and pretty much high. He probably ejaculated about two to three tablespoons worth.

Is it possible that the hardcore drugs he had been doing that week pass through his semen? If so, does this happen with every drug?

And, if so, if I were to get drug tested, would it show up?

I would appreciate any answers you can provide.


How do I French kiss?

1) Hey, okay, well I french kissed this guy and I didn't use my tongue. Are girls supposed to use their tongues? If so, which way does it go??

2) I have never really frenched a guy!! I have kissed like open mouth but not french. I was reading an article the other day in a mag (embarrassing moments) and this girl forgot to swallow her spit and when they pulled away it was like a big line of spit forming from both of their mouths. I was wondering if they were inexperienced or if they just forgot to swallow. I also have another question. My friend is going out with this guy and he always clanks teeth and bites her tongue and I'm hoping I won't be like that. How can you prevent it? Thank you so much.