Troubled by attraction to tall women
I'm a seventeen-year-old man and my problem is that I only like tall girls and I don't feel anything about shorter, beautiful girls. It's something that troubles me and I would like some advice. Thanks!
As cliché as it may sound, beauty is in the eye of the beholder: what attracts you to another individual doesn’t have to conform to any norms or standards aside from your own personal preference. One size doesn’t fit all when it comes to attraction and preferences and there’s nothing wrong with that.
There are plenty of factors that can influence your specific attraction to another person. If your main concern is that you might not be giving shorter girls a fair shot due to a lack of initial attraction, try striking up a conversation with someone on the shorter side. Studies have shown that our environments have a huge effect on how attracted we are to those around us, and after an initial conversation, people can become more physically attracted to someone whom they may not have otherwise considered their “type” if the chemistry is there. We also tend to immediately view those who match our physical preferences (in your case, taller girls) as possessing more positive attributes in general, such as such as sociability, altruism, and intelligence, simply because we're attracted to them. If you find yourself limiting your options to only the people you find yourself immediately attracted to because you think they’re the only ones for you, you may be missing out on others who are beautiful in other ways. You'll never know unless you try!
Asking yourself whether any of the aforementioned factors contribute to your preference for taller girls over shorter girls might help you understand the root of your preference better. Why do you think this preference for taller women is troubling you? Do you feel you should be attracted to shorter women as well, and if so, why do you think you feel this way? By answering these questions, perhaps you'll feel less troubled about your attraction to taller women. After all, there's nothing shameful or wrong about this preference — sometimes, our preferences are just our preferences, and as long as they’re not rooted in any kind of bigotry or bias, they’re probably harmless.
If you're still conflicted or troubled by your attraction to taller women, or if you'd like to talk to someone about it, you might consider seeking support with a professional counselor or therapist.
Originally published Mar 03, 2000
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