Nineteen-year-old virgin

Dear Alice,

I am almost nineteen and a virgin. I have had the opportunity to have sex, but have been holding out for that special person who I know exists somewhere. Sometimes I feel like a freak, though, like I have a problem. Should I just give up the wait, or give in to my hormones?


Dear Virginal,

This is a question that only you can answer for yourself. There is no right or wrong age to lose your virginity, and while you may think that every other nineteen-year-old is sexually active, it is not the case. At other times in this century, premarital chastity was the norm, and many did not marry until their thirties, if at all. While your inexperience may be atypical in the nineties, it is not abnormal. You need to decide for yourself when, with whom, and how you will have your first sex. There is no judgment, but from yourself, upon any aspect of this future experience. Do what seems "right" to you.

Last updated May 25, 2015
Originally published Jan 19, 1995

Submit a new comment


This question is for testing whether or not you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.

The answer you entered for the CAPTCHA was not correct.

Can’t find information on the site about your health concern or issue?