Why was my first time so painful?

1) I have never had sex, but I have tried now twice with my boyfriend, and it has been incredibly painful. It felt like there was a barrier inside me, and the second time I bled. I feel like I am relaxed, and my boyfriend is very gentle and slow, but it still really hurts — more than I think it should. I am able to use tampons — I'm not that small — but I don't know what the problem is. Is it supposed to hurt this much? Could there be something wrong?

2) I'm a virgin, and the first time my boyfriend inserted his fingers in my vagina, it hurt a lot, and I got sore down there. I didn't reach an orgasm, but faked it so he would stop. I didn't enjoy it at all and I was wondering... is this going to happen when I have sex? Is it going to be as disappointing?


What can I do if I'm experiencing an aversion to sex with my long-term partner?

I've been with my boyfriend for just over 4 years. Our sex life has always been the strong thread in our relationship, even when we've had trouble in other areas. We both feel we are the best sexual matches we've ever had. But over the past 8 months things have slowly degraded on my end. He is still as excited as ever, but I just don't feel like it. When we try, I actually feel physically protective, as if blocking my body from a stranger, especially my breasts. It's like a physical compulsion to protect, but neither of us have a history of abuse in our relationship or outside of it, and his approach is loving and open. When he's clothed and we're not about to have sex I love holding him, being held by him, standing next to him, touching him, etc. I'm not physically repulsed by his body: I recognize that he's a ridiculously attractive man! I had some advice that I shouldn't force myself to have sex if I don't want to, but I've also heard the opposite: that I should stop thinking and just push through my body's shutdown. Most of the times when I do force myself I end up enjoying it, but that doesn't take away this "repulsion" feeling at the start. The worst thing is that he feels rejected and dissatisfied and keeps asking what he can do to turn me on. What to do?


Why am I foaming after sex?

Today my partner and I were having sex and he "released" himself inside me. After sex, he began using a dildo on me until I was satisfied. Well, after going in and out of me real hard and fast, a foam-like substance began to appear. The foam was exactly like hair mousse. I am not on any type of birth control (he has a vasectomy), and I was recently tested for STDs a couple of months ago and everything was fine. Could you please tell me what this may have been from!


How can I prevent athletic performance anxiety?

I compete in an individual sport. The problem is that on the day of a major competition, I have really bad indigestion. Sometimes, I have to run to the bathroom every half hour for a bowel movement! Besides being annoying, disgusting, and a little embarrassing, this interrupts my competition and adds unneeded stress. Why is this happening and what can I do to prevent it?


Is it dangerous to hold in number two?

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost three years, and we've lived together for more than one, but I still can't do Number Two when he's in the house. It's not a problem during the week when we both go to our separate jobs, but on the weekends, it's usually just the two of us in the house all day (and night) Saturday and Sunday and if I feel the need to poo, I have to wait until Monday. My question is this — are there any adverse health issues I should be concerned about with waiting to poo? I know that holding your pee can give you bladder infections, but is there a similar issue with Number Two?


Can lowered testosterone levels in women reduce sex drive?

Do you have any information on the effects of low testosterone concerning sexual desire in women? After I got pregnant, I have had a significant drop in sexual desire and think it could be related to low testosterone. Any info on the subject? By the way, this problem had nothing to do with stress, marital problems, or the baby. Everything in my life is great except I lost my sexual desire and want to get it back. THANKS.