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Can frequent masturbation affect sexual function?

1) Hi! I have a question about orgasms. I'm a female who has masturbated since her early teens and wonder if I've "overdone" it somewhat. I did it so frequently (sometimes every other day or so; sometimes I waited longer) that now that I'm in my early 20s, I find it harder to reach orgasm, and harder to have multiple orgasms (it used to come so easily to me). Have I "lost" that momentum? Can I regain it if, say, I stopped masturbating for several weeks or months?

Also, my partner stimulates me manually or with his tongue, and I haven't been able to "come" yet... is it because I've masturbated too much? Do women take longer to come? I think he gets bored doing it...

2) My boyfriend has trouble ejaculating, usually taking a long time. I was wondering if it could have to do with his constant masturbation during most of his young life. Could it be that the problem is me? Is there a possibility that we can improve the situation?


Is it ok to use stimulant drugs to study?

1) I have a large amount of course work, which is combined with a job and extra-curriculars, and while I want to succeed in all of them, I find that I simply don't have enough time, even though I currently sleep only 4 or 5 hours a night. I mentioned this to a group of my friends here at school, and it turns out they all take stimulants to help them manage jam-packed undergraduate life. The pills are called ADDERALL and PROVIGIL. I have acquired some for myself, but before I take them, could you tell me if either has serious health risks? I do not have any other health problems or take any other medications. A few of my friends tell me that they sometimes stay awake for as long as 3 or 4 days. If it is reasonably safe, that would be great! Thank you.

2) Given the fact that this is a top-notch school, it's total hoo-ha that you haven't included any info on all the non-hard core, but still illegal, "study stimulants." Is all this ADDERALL gonna do me permanent damage or what?


What's normal when it comes to wet dreams?

1) Are wet dreams in a sexually active 23-year-old male unusual?

2) I only had about three to four "wet dreams" in my entire life and now I'm 20 years old. I wonder if it is normal, or it's because I masturbate often that I don't have these kinds of dreams. Is there a way of having one like that again?

3) I have a normal sex life with my wife (once or twice a week), but I have been having a problem lately. I have had about four wet dreams last year. I don't know why but I feel really bad about this. Is there something wrong with me? How can I stop this???


Why do I feel guilty after orgasming?

Every time I have an orgasm (alone or with a partner) I have intense feelings of guilt. I was not brought up in a religious household and was never told to "wait until marriage". I've been in long term relationships with all my sexual partners so it's not like I feel guilty for sleeping around. It's getting to the point where I'm not enjoying sex anymore because I dread the feelings I have after an orgasm. Is this normal?


How can I help a friend who’s struggling with alcohol?

1) I have two friends who I think are drinking too much. I don't know what to do. They are very defensive should anyone say anything to them about their excessive habit, and a lot of our friends are giving up on them. This has become a daily thing and their schoolwork and friendships are all suffering. They are both 21; one recently broke up with his girlfriend of several years and the other has been single for a while and he hates it. I know that has a lot to do with it. Please suggest some non-intrusive ways to help them. I'm really at a loss.

2) Last year, I became very good friends with a guy on my floor. He was a little out of the ordinary in the way he dressed, as well as in some of his opinions and habits. I had the feeling that he did drink more than he should, and he also did pot. I did not worry too much about it because it appeared to be more of a lifestyle choice than an addiction, and it did not cause him major troubles.

Unfortunately, he started to have academic problems. He did not do his work, missed classes, and eventually exams as well. I still did not relate these things to his alcohol and drug habits, and I hoped that once he got over the adjustment everyone needed to make in freshman year, he would be fine. Well, he wasn't. He did not come back to school this fall, and when I called him, I learned that he had gone through a lot that summer. He was diagnosed with depression and a cocaine addiction, put on Prozac, and sent to therapy. At that point, I thought that he was on the right track because he was also going to get a job and planning to take classes at a nearby college.

However, when he came to visit me a month later, he had already had two beers before he even came here and got more and more drunk as the evening progressed. I would not let him drive home, but he ignored my warnings and left anyway. I was very disturbed because a friend of his had just been in a drunk driving accident. I was very mad at him, told him clearly that I will always be his friend but prefer not to talk to him or see him if he showed up drunk again. He did not call for a while and neither did I. When he called me yesterday and I told him that I thought he should do something about his alcohol problem, he kept repeating his excuses, that he drinks because he is Irish, that he doesn't care if he dies early as long as he had fun in life, etc. On the other hand, he can't find a job and seems to be very depressed. I want to help him, but I don't know how. Any ideas?


Can excessive orgasming deplete endorphins?

Since orgasms cause a release of endorphins into one's cerebral-spinal fluid and endorphins are also somewhat responsible for the emotion of happiness, etc., is it possible that excessive masturbation and/or intercourse would lead to a depleted level of endorphins in the system that could in turn cause one's affect to become somewhat "flat"? Could a sustained low level of endorphins in the system induce depression and/or mood disorder?


Is it possible to have orgasms after childbirth?

My wife and I had our first child last July. Until about 3 months ago, she was unable to reach orgasm at all. Of late, she has very small one's, but they don't seem to be getting much better. Prior to having the baby, she had strong, very quick (3-5 minutes) orgasms 90% of the time. I know the stress of being at work rather than home with the baby could play a part in this. Is this common and is there a way to mitigate the problem? 


How can I stop smoking pot?

I have been doing weed for about six months now and on occasion a few other drugs. I usually do it only on average three times a week and a lot more on the weekends. I feel that it is ruining my life because my concentration is terrible and my marks have dropped significantly (20 points). I feel like I'm in a dream all the time and it just isn't fun anymore. I have heard that pot is not addictive but I have tried to stop but I feel sick and irritable if I don't smoke up. I have realized I need to quit but I can't. Why can't I stop if this "soft drug" is not addictive? Am I crazy? Please help. I want my life back. Thank you so much.


Why is drinking alcohol suddenly making me sick?

I have never had a problem with alcohol tolerances in the past. I could drink at least four or five drinks and be fine that night and the next morning. Now, I find myself getting violently sick after drinking just one or two. Even after a glass of wine I want to puke it up. Is there something physically wrong with me? I know the obvious solution is to stop drinking entirely. But, I shouldn't be this sick after drinking just one drink. Have you ever heard of this before? Can you help me figure out the problem?


How do I break the cycle of addiction?

My uncle shoots heroin. My father used to do cocaine. My moms' (both of them) used to smoke weed with their friends when I was eight. I smoked weed when I was twelve. I sold weed at 14.

I don't want to continue in the vein of my addictive family (no pun intended). How hereditary is addiction? What measures can I take to avoid falling into the same hazy trap of my family members?


How can I reach orgasm with and without sex toys?

1) I'm not an inexperienced girl at masturbation. I've been doing it for a very long time, but actually only ever discovered what an orgasm was when I was 18 and got my first vibrator. This never bothered me because I wasn't sexually active then, but now it does. I realized I have NEVER been able to orgasm from physical touching or from just using fingers. I've always needed a vibrator of sorts and this is worrying me for future relationships and stuff with partners. How can I learn to orgasm from touch instead of vibration? I've tried before and have always just gotten frustrated or fallen asleep.

2) I've sorta been curious lately about what it feels like to do the big M using my fingers. I'm uncomfortable doing it though. I can't even use a tampon let alone do THAT with my fingers and I don't have anything that vibrates. What other options do I have?


Why does my boyfriend have difficulty orgasming with a condom?

After being on birth control pills for the past two-and-a-half years, I stopped taking them because of side-effects. Since going off the pill, my boyfriend and I have been using condoms with an additional spermicide. The problem is that he is having a difficult time having an orgasm. He says that the condoms do not provide him with enough stimulation to be able to ejaculate. As a result of this dilemma, our sex life has become almost non-existent.

Could it be the type of condoms that we are using? We're using latex condoms. What can we do? Our sex life is riding on this!


Where can I find support as an adult child of an alcoholic?

1) Are there any adult children of alcoholics groups on campus?

2) My father is an alcoholic and I've been told that I should stay away from drinking altogether. I'm a freshman this year and it seems like most of my friends always want to go to keg parties or hang out and drink. Sometimes I drink with them, but then I feel guilty and worried afterwards as I think about my dad. It's hard to avoid alcohol here, but I don't want to follow in my father's footsteps either. Any advice or support you can give would help. Thanks.


How can I have fun without drugs?

I think it would be a good idea for me to stop smoking marijuana and cut down on my drinking, at least during the school year. The problem is, I have been doing it for so long it is almost as though I have forgotten how to have fun without it. Contributing to this problem is the fact that many of my friends smoke or drink to have fun. Many of my other friends just do not seem to have fun at all; they stay in Friday and Saturday nights to do work. I've found it difficult to quit, I think because I'm just not sure of what's out there to do that's fun without being stoned or drunk. Can you recommend anything that's fun whether you're intoxicated or sober, so that I don't have to stop hanging out with certain friends if I want to relax and have fun? I want to finally enjoy life without relying on an altered state of consciousness. What's there to do when you're sick of renting movies? Also, any tips for resisting the urge to take people up on their offer to toke up? (I'm never pressured into it, but it's like the dieter who's offered some chocolate cake — it's there, it looks sooo good, and the fact that other people are doing it makes it seem more "okay.") Thanks so much.


How do marijuana and Prozac interact?

I have two friends who were recently diagnosed with depression. They were both prescribed Prozac by their respective doctors. Both of them are heavy marijuana users and both failed to mention that to their doctors. One has been on Prozac for two months and the other for six weeks. I have noticed that their behavior has become strange: mood swings, paranoia, oversleeping, fatigue. They continue taking their Prozac (20 mg a day) and continue smoking pot. I am afraid that there might be some negative interaction between the substances, one being an antidepressant and the other a depressant. Can you provide some insight?


Can you orgasm while exercising?

I'm an athlete, and about a year ago, I purchased one of those ab rollers. One time, I was going through the motions and I experienced an orgasm. Now, it happens about every time I use it. I thought it was extremely weird, but then read where women experience orgasms through lots of things. I was just wondering how it is possible for those feelings to happen just by working out my abs. Also, what are some other weird ways that women have had orgasms? Thanks so much.


What should I do about friend's escalating drug use?

I have a friend at school who quit smoking last year in January, and went back to it in October. I have no idea why, and he also started doing other drugs, such as smoking blunts, doing ecstasy, and taking steroids. The drug that I am worried about him doing the most is ecstasy, because it's a dangerous drug. Also, he is always talking about doing drugs. How can I help him? I still want him to be my friend. Please help. This is serious.


Should I come clean about faking orgasms?

I have been in a good relationship for almost four years. My boyfriend is loving and generous and I have good reason to believe this will lead to marriage. (I hope!) The problem is that I have faked orgasm with him since we first started dating. At first I just thought it would be a fling and wanted to be "good in bed." As time went on, I realized this could be the real thing, but by then, it was too late to tell him the truth. It's not his fault — I have never been able to orgasm through intercourse no matter whom I was with or what I tried. I feel sad all the time for lying to him (sometimes he suspects I've faked it, but I still deny it). It just seemed easier to let him believe it because I didn't want to be a frustration to him and he seems so happy when he thinks he has satisfied me. My question is: should I tell him now after almost four years? I think he would be crushed! Maybe he'd be angry that I've lied so much. Maybe I don't want the pressure of having to really come. But I really don't think I can keep this bottled up inside anymore.

Sigh...


How can I find help for my substance use?

I have a huge dilemma. I have an addiction to a certain drug that has turned my life upside down. That drug is crack cocaine. The worst part about it is that nobody knows this but me. Nobody knows that right now, my life is on the brink. How do you express this problem to people who don't even have a clue as to what you are dealing with? How do you reach out to the people who you love and trust when you are so ashamed of the truth? One thing that I do know is that I'd better do something fast because if I don't, I will lose my fight with life. HELP!!


Is there hope for me after meth abuse?

I have been trying to find information about the hope for recovery for previous meth users, but there doesn't seem to be a consensus. Some sources say that meth causes permanent damage to the brain, while others are a little more hopeful and say some important brain functions might recover.

I used meth about fifteen times, which I gather isn't a lot in comparison to other meth users but is still a considerable amount. For a while I have felt paranoid and anxious and it has been more difficult to perform daily tasks and just generally think straight. Also, things I used to enjoy are not really that enjoyable anymore.

My question is, will I be able to have my brain back? If so, how much of it? Will I ever go back to being my old self?


Is using muscle relaxants that aren't prescribed to me safe?

I originally took a muscle relaxer because I was experiencing very bad back pain and could not sleep. I was not prescribed the muscle relaxers. My friend suggested I take one of hers. So I did, and now I will take one sometimes before bed if I can't fall asleep or if I want to actually just relax. It makes me just want to sleep, and I feel really calm after taking one. Is this bad that I take them for this reason? What are the side effects? Is it harmful?


Is being addicted to nicotine gum better than being addicted to smoking?

I have a very addictive personality. Fortunately, I am married and have a family and because of the added responsibility of taking care of my family I stay away from a lot of the harmful vices. However, for some stupid reason I decided to try out nicorette. I quit smoking about 12 years ago and thought I would just try out nicorette to see if I could get a buzz. Well two years later I am totally hooked on the stuff and wondering if I should start smoking/chew/patch to get off the stuff. How bad is nicorette for you and is it better than smoking?


How can I find someone who understands my sobriety?

I am an ex-hardcore drug user — speed and cocaine to heroin — with 25 months of sobriety from drugs and alcohol. Now that I do not go out to clubs or party, I am finding difficulty in relationships.

Women do not understand why I do not drink. When they ask, I tell them where drugs and alcohol have gotten me in the past. This always seems to scare them off.

I feel guilty not telling them that I used to be an intravenous drug user, but when they ask about the tattoo on my arm that symbolizes a promise to myself never to inject again. I am honest about what it stands for. I never shared needles, I have been tested for AIDS/Hep-C and all of the tests have returned negative.

I am having difficulty finding someone that understands.


Am I addicted to methadone?

I have been taking between 5 and 10 mgs of methadone daily. I cannot seem to stop. Every time I try, I get very, very depressed and experience abdominal pain, chills, hot flashes, and sleeplessness. The depression and tremendous anxiety are intolerable and I end up taking more to avoid it. Question: Am I harming my body and/or mind with this stuff? How can I get off without the horrible feelings?


How can I find help to stop drinking?

I have just realized that I am not able to handle alcohol. Whenever I go to a bar or a club, I drink to excess. I do not have any urge to drink. However, when I am in a club or a bar, the same thing happens: I drink too much! This is making me think that I am an alcoholic. My question is: Where can I go for help? Thanks.


Is my loved one doing cocaine?

1) I found a white powder in my friend's car and I think it might be cocaine. I'm not sure if it is or not. I don't know if I should confront him with it or what I should do. I don't want to see my friend get hurt, but if I'm wrong, I don't want to falsely accuse him of something like this. How should I go about handling the situation?

2) I am a first-year business student and have a little sister who is a junior. I think she is doing cocaine because I found some "paraphernalia" in her room last week. What can I do without damaging my relationship with her?


How can I help friend with a cocaine addiction?

My friend recently told me that she has a serious blow problem. She lives with her boyfriend and she said that all they do is work, sleep, and blow. By telling me this I understand that she has taken some very important steps into wanting to get better, but I'm completely useless in trying to help because I just don't know enough about the drug and rehab and ways to support her.

So far I've made the suggestion that she come spend some time with me and away from home so that the reminder of it is lessened, I can prevent her from bringing it in, and can try and keep her occupied to take her mind off it. What else can you suggest?


What to do when my boyfriend cares more if I cum than I do?

It's very hard for me to orgasm during sex, even if I help myself. I can do it all by my lonesome very quickly, but as soon as I'm with a guy, I just can't cum. However, I'm not worried by this whatsoever. I love sex, and I love everything about it. I love the act of sex, I love pleasuring my partner, I love the sights, smells, and sounds of sex. If I don't cum, meh, I'm still very happy. I'm no happier if I do orgasm during sex.

My problem seems to be keeping my partners happy with my contentment with not orgasming. They seem to think it's their life mission to make me orgasm. I had one boyfriend with whom I actually faked orgasming for a good two years because he was so upset that he couldn't make me cum. Every other partner I've had since then has taken it personally that I can't orgasm with them. It seems to put a bit of strain on my relationships.

I am with a new guy that I care for very deeply. He has been very understanding of my not orgasming, but he seems to try that much harder, and I think he is getting frustrated. I have orgasmed once since we've been together (a mere month and a bit), so it can be done, but I really don't want him to take it personally. I've told him already about this, and he said he was surprised that I'm cool with it. I REALLY don't want him to be disappointed and have this strain our relationship (like every other relationship I've had). I really do like him that much.

What can I do or say to ease his mind?