Recently there have been creams for women sold over-the-counter to improve sexual enjoyment for women. Are these lotions safe for women and the men who love them, and do they work? I am familiar with a particular lotion called "Viacreme."

You have a long section about female genital mutilation, but what are your views on male genital mutilation? Why make a distinction?

I know that some women do get fevers as a part of their period, but is it normal to get high fevers? I have never had a problem with my period before, but the last two periods have had me chilled, feverish, and with a temperature of up to 102 degrees Fahrenheit, I couldn't even go to work or anything for like a week. I don't use tampons, and I'm not sexually active. I am in pretty good shape. Please tell me I won't have to take a week off of my life every month from now on because of these awful fevers. Is there anything I can do?

Quite often when my boyfriend and I have sex, the condom disappears into my vagina. As you can imagine, it is extremely mood killing and a little disconcerting for me to have to reach up there and find it. I read your response to another couple with the same problem, and we'll definitely make sure to hold onto the condom before pulling out. I use Depo-Provera (so the condom is used just to be extra sure), so I'm not particularly worried about pregnancy. What I would like to know, though, is why this happens to us so often? I've never lost condoms with any other partners. I also have the feeling sometimes that it might be coming off before ejaculation. This seems to happen quite frequently (one out of every two or three times we have sex). It's kind of frustrating. Is there anything else we could do differently?

I have heard that it is unsafe to keep condoms in wallets, since they can get broken or weak with all the bending the wallet does when you sit down. Is that true?

My boyfriend and I live on opposites sides of the world. We have joked about phone sex, but I am really shy, so I don't know how to approach it. How would I initiate it over the phone?

I'm a man and I'm engaged in a lot of sports and outdoor activities, but lately some of my friends said that biking could result in male infertility. Is this true? How? What are the other activities that could lead to male infertility? How can I stay healthy in terms of fertility?

As I looked in your list for contraception methods, I couldn't find a thing called "Intrauterinpessar," or maybe it's a bad translation of the popular German word, "coil." Isn't that used in the U.S.? Are there reasons for not using them? Thank you for answering.

My girlfriend and I like to drip hot candle wax on each other. Is that safe? Can there be any damage or anything? I wouldn't exactly want anything bad to happen to either of us down there... Thanks!

I was wondering about the effects of the birth control pill on orgasms. Any connection? Some friends have told me it makes things easier while some say it makes getting orgasms more difficult. What's the real story?

I've been using name brand birth control pills for eight years and now my insurance company will only cover generic birth control pills. Do you know anything about the pros and cons of using generic pills as opposed to name brand pills? Are they as effective?

I'm a 19-year-old uncircumcised male. There was a group discussion about sex in my dorm, and people were describing how erect, an uncircumcised and circumcised penis should look alike, that the foreskin should pull back all the way. I had never thought anything of this before, but looking it up on the internet found that I have what I believe to be a frenulum breve, in that my foreskin retracts (unlike phimosis) but not all they way. Unfortunately, all of the information about this (as well as surgery info) is from the UK. I have searched the web for hours and couldn't find any information about this condition in the US. I was just hoping you might shed some light on my condition, as well as on a procedure called frenuloplasty.

When was the first dildo invented and what was it originally used for?

I've seen the recommendations. I've seen the suggestions for do-it-yourself workaround (cutting open a condom, plastic wrap... ). What I *haven't* seen is practical usage advice — how to place the thing effectively, how to overcome the limitations of losing direct contact, how to arrange things to permit vaginal penetration with fingers while still maintaining protection and so on. Best-practice condom use isn't perfectly obvious either, but at the most basic level it's pretty straightforward. If you want to build acceptance for barrier use during cunnilingus, it needs to be at least as clear and/or at least as well-documented.

Dear Alice,

I recently had a routine HIV screening done for prenatal labs. It was positive. Thank GOD, western blot came out to be negative. My OB is reassuring me not to worry, that false positives sometimes come out in pregnancy, and as long as the western blot is negative — I'm negative. Could you explain a little more in detail as to why and if you agree with my doctor? I'm at very little risk otherwise and had a negative HIV test about five years ago and am with the same person (my husband).

When I masturbate, I can never achieve orgasm. I've never had an orgasm and I think I am not concentrating enough. After a while, it just gets annoying down there and I give up. Any tips on how I can concentrate more or what I should think about?

1) I like to kiss my wife's feet. Do I have a foot fetish?

2) I get sexually aroused by feet. Am I a freak, or what?

3) I have two questions:

1. It's getting to be summer over here; I don't know if that's part of it, but why do so many people wear sneakers or sports shoes without socks? Is it a new style or something?

2. Does it mean I have a foot fetish if I get a "hard on" when I see other guys not wearing socks? I mean, I've seen the foot fetish web pages and I have no reaction to them (basically the same reaction as if I were reading a VCR manual). And, occasionally, I do get a really big "woody" when I go out in public barefoot in my high-top sneakers or see other people do it.

Okay, so my mother does not believe, as I do, that when a group of women live closely together (i.e., in a dorm setting) that their menstrual cycles become roughly similar, due to the release of pheromones. I'm pretty sure that I heard this somewhere, but I can't find anything to back it up. I swear I'm not making it up, but my mom doesn't believe me.

Thanks for your help.

1) You've mentioned a lot in this service about a woman's menstrual cycle, and the risks involved with unprotected sex. Details that you have mentioned include, for example, the high risk of pregnancy (i.e., as a result of unprotected sex or failed contraception) during the "fertile period" of a woman's cycle. What I would like to know is: what (typically) are the various stages in the cycle (e.g., ovulation followed by menstruation, etc.), when do they typically occur in the cycle, and, most importantly, WHEN are the (typical, of course) fertile and infertile (minimum chance of pregnancy) parts of the cycle?

2) When calculating the length of your menstrual cycle, what is considered to be the actual first day of your cycle? Is it the first day there is "red" bleeding, or does it also include the first day or two of brown discharge?

1) I am a male in his twenties, and I am considering circumcision. Is it safe to be circumcised at my age? And how many days do I need to recover?

2) I'm a guy who's considering being circumcised. What sort of health benefits are there to the procedure? Are there any drawbacks? Also, how much of the foreskin is removed? A little bit? Most of it? All of it, right down to the base of the head? Or what?

The service that you provide is very informative. Thank you for it. When I have sex with my girlfriend and I thrust my penis deep into her body, she says that she can feel it hit something hard inside her body. I can't feel it hit anything. She is very curious to know what it is that I am hitting. Could you shed some light on this issue?

What is the deal with menstrual cups? How is it different than a diaphragm? Is it safe? Is it safe for virgins to use? Is insertion much more difficult than tampons? How do you take it out? What are the benefits? I'd like an educated opinion.

I have what appears to be scar tissue in the form of a straight line all the way down my penis, over my testicles and ends after that. Is this unusual for a guy? I am circumcised. Is this scar tissue from that or some strange webbing from birth?

Is it true that a woman can have multiple orgasms?

1) What is the average number of sexual partners per year for undergrads?

2) Do you know how many college students are having sex? Are there any statistics? I was wondering if it is lower than a lot of people would have you believe. I feel like I'm the only one sometimes who is not having sex. Thought maybe I'd see if it was true. Thanks.

I recently had an IUD inserted. I'm not currently having sex, but wanted to be prepared as I am seeing someone who I may become sexually involved with.

My concern is I was told the IUD would need to be removed if I had sex with a partner and then changed partners later. This IUD is a 5-year IUD and the cost was quite a bit. If I have sex now and then stop for a year (or any period of time) and was to become sexually involved again with another partner, why would it need to be removed? If STDs are not an issue, does it still need to be removed?

My new girlfriend and I had sex for the first time this weekend. Later in the evening, she was curious about something... "Where is that thing going???" she asked. She mentioned that full insertion was painful and she wanted to know what I was hitting, and "how far does it go?" Being admittedly a bit rusty on my knowledge of the anatomy of the female body, I told her that I thought it went no further than the "uvula" (whatever that is), but that I would do a little research, maybe see what I could get off the Net and get back to her.