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How can we make it more equal when it comes to initiating sex?

I have been with my long term girlfriend for five years. I am seriously thinking about getting engaged.

Over the last three years she has taken control of our sex life. I have definitely become submissive in the bedroom. We don’t get into BDSM, but she always decides when, where, and how. She loves this control. While I have come to accept my submissive role, and I do certainly enjoy making love to her and pleasing her, I have asked her on many occasions for some variety. I would like to enter her sometimes and she has not performed oral sex on me for years. Granted, I am a bit under average in the endowment area and she always has a hard time reaching orgasm with straight intercourse. I have tried to talk to her, but she always shuts down the convo by making me admit that I love pleasuring her. Of course when we start fooling around I am so excited that I just follow her lead.

Honestly, I am very happy in every other aspect and I don't want to add any friction to the relationship. She is a very private person and doesn’t like to talk sex. Visiting a therapist is not an option as I have already subtly suggested it and been rebuffed. Should I be overly concerned? Should I continue to press the issue (although it doesn’t seem to be getting me anywhere) or just accept my role? Again, I do enjoy pleasing her and I usually get off. I guess I could be happy continuing this way and I don't want to lose her. I would love your thoughts.

Topics:

Relationships Sexual and Reproductive Health

Do plant-based sunscreens work?

Recently I bought a sun protection cream from a health food store. The cream claims to provide sun protection (it's labeled SPF 15) by a plant complex made of PABA, willow bark extract, myrtle and myrtus leaf extract. It says that myrtle and myrtus leaf help protect from both UVA and UVB.

My questions are as follows:

1) Can this PABA complex provide the sun protection it claims (SPF 15 for both UVA and UVB rays)? The reason I am asking this is because until now I had only heard of sun protection by titanium dioxide or chemicals like octyl mexaoxycinnamate (did I get it right?). So I am curious to find out.

2) I notice a slight burning sensation in my eyes after I apply the product on my face. Is it true that PABA is a common irritant? (Since I notice many products proudly claiming PABA-free I wonder if it's really not good for you.)

Please help. I hope this question falls within your realm of expertise. After all, you are the 'know it all' around here, aren't you?

Topics:

General Health

What are the effects of taking salvia divinorum?

Recently, I have heard about a new hallucinogen available called salvia dinorium. Some of my friends have tried it and they tell me it is an incredible experience and that when you hallucinate, you have the perception of being brought back in time. Before I even think about trying this, however, I would like to have a more precise idea of what the effects are and what the possible risks of taking salvia are.

Topics:

Substance Use and Recovery

Who will see my STI test results?

I have been thinking about getting tested for STIs for a while now but have been concerned with medical privacy policy. From the research I have done, I have not been able to find if I tested positive for an STI would I be referred to in name as a 'risk to public safety' or simply as a statistic. I know that this will be placed in my medical records and documented for the rest of my life. Will I have a label attached to my name for the rest of my life? Who will be notified if I do test positive for something like syphilis or herpes?

Topics:

Sexual and Reproductive Health
Showing 211 - 220 of 1187 results

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