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Am I bulimic, or is it just a phase?

I am a college freshman and I think I'm on my way to becoming bulimic. Since my junior year of high school, I have periodically binged and tried to purge, but I was never really successful and it was never frequent. My senior year I made myself semi-successfully throw up for the first time, but it was gross and scary and made my throat bleed and I stopped. However, since I've gotten to school this year, I feel like things have gotten out of control. I started out eating healthfully and losing weight, because I am about 15 pounds overweight and need to make a lower weight class for my sport. (I am at a high level and compete internationally.) I'm also terrified of the "freshman fifteen" since I've always been chubby at the least. I couldn't keep up my healthy eating and snapped, and now I binge all the time and for the past few weeks have been throwing up. I think I could stop but I'm not sure. Am I bulimic or just going through typical freshman food phase?

Thanks for any advice.


What are the effects of calorie counting and intermittent fasting?

1) I've started counting calories in order to lose weight, and I've lost ten pounds in six months, so I'm positive that counting calories works. Recently I've started to eat one big meal (about 1400 calories) a day. Is this healthy? Will I continue to lose weight?

2) During the day, I keep a strict paleo diet and end eating at 10PM and Begin eating at 12 PM the next day. Around 10:30 AM the next day, I do full a body weight training session and begin eating at 12 PM. Basically, I only drink water during my fast or keep calories to a five calorie maximum. After the fast, I eat whatever I want (paleo that is). I'm trying to get my body to use excess fat as energy, therefore causing me to lose body fat and gain muscle faster. I feel great and I have witnessed fast results, (increased strength and leanness) within a month and half of intermittent fasting. My question is do you think intermittent fasting is unsafe? Or just a new an effective way to see increased health?


Why did my father abandon me?

My father left my mother before I was born. They had a good relationship and were happy, but then my mom became pregnant with me. She had trouble telling my father, who was only eighteen at the time, and said she didn't expect him to play a role in my life. So, he left.

I've never seen him or spoken to him in my life. I have no idea what he looks like or who he is and he seems to have no desire to have anything at all to do with me. In fact, he ditched town the day after he found out. I'm mad... I'm mad at my mother for making it so easy for him to leave and I hate that man for what he did. I'm still young and even I can't imagine deserting a child and leaving them without a parent for their entire life. But then maybe that's because I know how it feels and I would never put anyone through that kind of pain. As a girl, I suppose it's hard to understand. Perhaps you can help me to understand his reasoning?


Can I treat depression on my own?

I'm a first year college student. Since the holidays I started experiencing a very strong horrible feeling; so horrible I preferred to die than to keep on feeling it (the suicidal thoughts come and go still, but it's not as strong as in the beginning). It's very puzzling though because I don't have a reason to feel like this, not one that I know of at least.

I thought of going to a psychologist, or psychiatrist, but I don't have money to do so, and I thought that maybe I should try curing myself first. Is there any way to try to fight depression by myself? Also, if I don't have a reason to feel depressed, what reasons could there be for what's happening to me? I read in other things you wrote to people that depression may be also caused by chemical imbalances in the brain. How do I know if that's happening to me?


When do I need to get treatment for depression?

I'm a college student who is struggling with the decision on when to see a doctor for treatment with my depression symptoms. I believe that I need to get treated for depression, but I'm just as scared about not getting treatment as I am about starting antidepressant drugs in my current lifestyle. As far as I can tell, I'm exhibiting the classic symptoms of depression, and have been for a while — frequent crying fits, days where I lose all motivation, and sometimes, even thoughts of suicide. But I drink frequently, almost every weekend, and use marijuana occasionally, and I am quite unsettled by the possible interactions between antidepressants and these other substances. In my day to day life I do very well — I hold a good GPA, have good relationships and a good social life, function well most of the time, and stay in shape for sports. I don't intend to change my lifestyle significantly to make room for depression treatment. But when do I need to get help? I don't want to force an unnecessary change on myself, but I don't want to put myself in danger from depression, or even worse, from the drug interactions between antidepressants and alcohol or weed. What is the tipping point?