Is it important to have a primary health care provider?

I've been hearing a lot about having one health care provider follow my medical history, but I'm fairly healthy and don't have a chronic disease. I've been switching from my local doctors when I'm home to the on-campus docs. Is it really that important, given that I'm a healthy individual?


Why can't I communicate with people anymore and what can I do about it?

I've been "plagued" with this problem for at least a year now, and it seems to be getting progressively worse. I feel like I have lost the ability to communicate with people. Sure, I can make small talk about the weather and stuff like that, but I feel like I've lost my openness and humor with people. I figure I am changing and learning new things about myself, but this is getting ridiculous because it is affecting my social life drastically.

Whenever I get into a conversation with someone, either on the phone or in person, I become flustered. I have a problem with eye contact and I become very hot and sometimes I turn red in the face. Worst of all, my mind seems to be blank all the time and I can't get past small talk (even with my friends). I put a lot of pressure on myself when it comes to maintaining eye contact and continuing a conversation, but this pressure seems to fluster me more. I also seem to notice long pauses in conversation which I interpret as moments of awkwardness.

I realize that I have nothing to prove to anyone, but this problem still persists. I used to be very social before and now I am not. So what must I do to get by this? I figure, I'll just deal with it and it will go away, but it's been going on for too long. What must I do?


Why can't I recognize myself in the mirror?

I look at my reflection time and time again, and I ask myself: "Is that me?" At some point during the past 3 years or so of my life (throughout which there has been no specific traumas I can name, recall, or otherwise), I have lost the ability to recognise my own reflection. Looking at recent photographs, I often have to take a few moments to recognise myself then. Older photographs are even harder to recognise, especially if I was unaware of the photo being taken. Do I suffer from some kind of neurological pattern-matching disorder? It reminds me of dissociative identity disorder, but I have no referential 'other identity(ies)' to work this from. Is this a common problem for 16-year-olds like myself, or am I going insane faster than I thought?


How can I get over agoraphobia?

I have suffered from agoraphobia since the age of thirteen. I am now twenty. I have tried hypnotherapy counseling and psychologists and herbal tablets, but nothing seems to help me. Please, can you help a young, outgoing twenty-year-old who wants to start living!


What should I do about my girlfriend's ex-boyfriend who won't go away?

What should I do about my girlfriend's ex-boyfriend? Their friendship is getting out of hand. He is consistently telling her how regretful it is for him and he wants her back badly. He would go out of his way to see and to talk to her. This is affecting my relationship. It is affecting my girlfriend emotionally. This has been going on for four years. I met my girlfriend two years after their break up. He is now more persistent than ever.


What should I do if I'm pregnant where abortion isn't legal?

I am really nervous because my period is a week late so far and I am studying abroad in Egypt. I really don't know who to talk to about this. Premarital sex is a big taboo, abortion is illegal, and I can't even find a pregnancy test at a pharmacy. What should I do? I can't come back to the U.S. with a big belly — I can't tell my family! I am so afraid! I left the U.S. a month ago (my partner is still there). I read that jetlag can influence your menstrual cycle, as can weight gain or loss. I was jetlagged, but my weight is more or less the same (except I am eating more rice and oil than I do normally). Could diet change your cycle? Anyway, I guess my main question is, what should you do if you find out you are pregnant in a conservative country where abortion is illegal and don't have enough money to fly home and back? Thanks.


What should I do if I'm pregnant and undecided?

I am nineteen-years-old. I just found out that I'm pregnant. I have been with the guy for two years and in college for one year. We are not financially stable. We have given it a lot of thought, but still do not know what to do. I have looked at the pros and cons and still I'm not sure. I have three little sisters and know that raising children is a hard job. Throughout this time I have leaned more toward the abortion, but don't feel like I know enough about it. Can you please HELP?


How can I stop being shy?

I'm a graduate student who is still trying to cope with shyness. I have extreme difficulty talking to people — even to people I see and work with everyday. I know making friends takes time and patience, but I seem to be at a loss as to how to develop acquaintances too. I've always been antisocial, but I never wanted to be. Who does, right? But I just don't know how not to be.

I'm studying a profession that requires a lot of personal communication; so, it's making me nervous and depressed whenever I can't overcome my introvertedness. But it's not my career that worries me the most. I sense my emotional well-being deteriorating every time I feel myself lost around others. Is there anything I can do to overcome shyness? I've been reading articles about the antidepressant drug Prozac and its success on passive people — should I consider it? Or are there places I can go for therapy? Thanks.


Am I bi, gay, pansexual, or something else?

I don't like to be considered gay nor bisexual, and I identified as pansexual for a bit, until I found out that pansexuality is sexual expression of all kinds. I want to know what I am. I don't like labels and I think that everyone and anyone can fall in love with anyone else of any gender; therefore I believe that there is no such thing as sexual orientations. What is a word for that?


Why am I itchy after the condom broke?

I've just had my first condom break ever. I'm on the pill, so I'm not worried about pregnancy, but a couple of days afterwards I had yeast infection-like symptoms — no unusual discharge, just itching. If I pick up some over-the-counter yeast infection medication and the symptoms go away, would I be safe to assume that was the problem? Or should I definitely go in for an STI check?


Is weightlifting for 5 hours per day too much?

I am a wrestler and have very great ambitions within the sport. I lift weights for five to six hours a day, making sure I perform every set to failure often including negatives as well. In addition to working each muscle group two times a week, I make sure to give each muscle group 48 to 72 hours of rest. Recently though, I have learned that training longer than an hour a day can have a catabolic (muscle breakdown) effect on your body. This was very concerning to me because muscle-wasting during my training seems truly counter-productive, but I am also aware that a decrease in training may lead to muscle atrophy and that also poses a deep concern. I have also learned that cardio and even sleep can have a catabolic effect. I will have to cut my training time eventually due to time restrictions during the season because of school day and team practices, including traveling time and homework. I am posing a couple of questions within this letter: 1) Can I reduce the volume of my routine to about an hour and still make gains that are comparable or better to those I experience with my five to six hour workouts and if so, how? 2) Is catabolism truly a legitimate matter to be concerned with?


How can I keep dating my boyfriend when he's a different person on his medication?

I am a 32-year-old woman dating a very nice man my age. My boyfriend and I have been dating for just about a year and we are serious about each other. He has severe asthma and has to be on high doses of steroids during and for a long time after a flare-up. The problem is these steroids have a terrible effect on him: he breaks out in acne; he is irritable and loses control of his temper; his appetite is voracious; he puffs out in his stomach and face.

The problem with his temper and irritability is what most bothers me, it is as if he has a completely different personality and sometimes it is frightening. We have talked to his doctor who says that these steroids are the drug of choice and if he does not take them as an outpatient, he would have to be hospitalized and put on the same medications.

As I said, his personality can be frightening on the steroids, but I have seen my boyfriend in an asthma attack which is even more frightening. I once talked to a therapist about this problem. Maybe I should have been more careful in choosing a therapist, but this woman came from a feminist perspective and in a sense told me that I should break up with this man. I don't think that this is the solution since I love him very much and I know that off steroids he is the man I love.


What should I do to reconnect with distant boyfriend?

I wanted to ask you a question that I can’t even answer myself. Well, I have a boyfriend and we’ve been together for seven months now. We both love each other so much and I always make sure he knows that. I do everything for him: cook, clean, wash clothes, practically everything to make him happy. He used to be really loving with me. I mean, he still is, but I feel as if he’s changed in some way. Before, we used to be able to tackle our problems and if we argued, we would sit down and fix the problem. Now, he just ignores it and leaves, and smokes his weed. What’s your advice?


How can I grow and strengthen my nails?

My fingernails fray and chip all the time. I have tried many different nail polishes and nail hardener but nothing helps. I've been trying to grow my nails for the past year and I just can't seem to get them to grow. My mother and older sister don't have any problems getting their nails to grow. Please give me some tips on how to make my nails grow stronger and fast.


What should I do if I'm a conservative Christian and I'm considering sex before marriage?

I'm a Christian, very conservative in upbringing, and I'm having difficulties in discussing sex in an open and casual manner. I told my male friends that sex should be done within the parameters of marriage. But they told me that I should have a first sexual experience so as to satisfy my wife or maybe a girlfriend (I don't have one yet). Should I follow their opinion regarding this? Should I first know the sexual dynamics of sexual intercourse before doing it with her?

I would appreciate your kind response.

Thank you.


How can I buy cheap produce and not let it go bad?

I know how important it is to get plenty of fruits and vegetables in one's diet, but I've been finding it difficult ever since I moved out to do so. I live by myself, on a fixed income, and I can only grocery shop once a week. Whenever I buy fruits and vegetables, they end up going bad three or four days after I buy them, and I feel like I've wasted them. Do you have any advice on cheap, vitamin-rich fruits or vegetables that keep for a good long time? Thanks!


How can I continue in my relationship after my girlfriend cheated?

I am in a long distance relationship and my girlfriend recently admitted that she had cheated on me. She said, and I believe her, that she really loves me and that this was a mistake she regrets. However, I can't take it out of my mind and forget about it. I am angry that she ruined the purity of our love story. It feels like it's no longer "a dream come true" — merely a watered down version of it because it is no longer "flawless." I feel like a pushover for not doing anything about it. (I'm really in love with her and I can't bring myself to break up just for that.) How can I forgive her? Will I always keep these poisonous thought inside? How can I prevent this from shadowing every aspect of our relationship? Am I "selling short" and blind to her untrustworthiness? How can I trust her again?


Can I talk about my relationship in therapy without my girlfriend getting uncomfortable?

My partner gets nervous every time I see my psychotherapist because she doesn't like the idea of me talking about our relationship. For her, it's anxiety-producing because she fears there are things I tell my therapist that I don't tell her. For me, it's anxiety-producing because I feel like my therapy sessions should be a safe and confidential space for me and because I feel like having that space has made our relationship better overall. How can I assuage her fears and anxieties without feeling like I have to, a) tell her everything I say in therapy, or b) lie and say that she doesn't come up?


Can you lose weight if you meet your caloric goal early in the day?

My friends and I disagree — can you settle the dispute? I feel a calorie is a calorie no matter what time of day that you eat it. They say that if you eat all of your calories early in the day, that it is less fattening, because you will be moving around burning off those calories. I say that if you eat 1800 calories a day, it doesn't matter if you eat them in five meals or ten meals, it is still 1800 calories. I believe that the idea of not eating anything after 7 p.m. helps you to lose weight because you cut out the high calorie, high fat foods that are often eaten late in the evening. They say that by not eating after 7 p.m., you lose weight because you're not moving to burn off those calories. Please settle the dispute. Thanks.


Why do people do drag?

I have a friend who recently came out of the closet, and now he's very involved in his college GLSBT (not sure if I have the letters right) community. My question is this: He has now, as a matter of pride and fun, I think, become involved in drag shows. He looks pretty good as a woman, if I do say so, but I just don't get it. What's the point of drag? Why do gay men do it? It's especially confusing for me because I don't hear of lesbian women dressing up as men, or at least not as much, and it's not a "spectacle" like drag shows are. I'm just confused — what exactly is drag FOR?


How to navigate relationship with gay roommate?

When I came to Columbia, my roommate and I got along really well. We still do. However, three weeks into the year, I learned that he is gay. I have no problems with this, I'd like to think that I'm open-minded — but can you give me some advice on how to handle this relationship?


How can I cure a sunburn?

I was in the sun for seven hours yesterday and I got a pretty bad sunburn. My face has blisters all over it. The redness is severe, and the pain is severe. Any suggestions that you may have will help. To top it off, I am a diabetic and am worried about infection of the blisters.


What are the differences between sun protection products?

I find choosing among all of the available sunscreens and sunblocks to be very confusing. Of the following three products I am currently using, which one is giving my skin the most protection: sunscreen SPF 30 with UVA, UVB, and IR sun protection; sunblock SPF 17 with UVA, UVB, and IR sun protection; or, sunblock SPF 50 with UVA and UVB sun protection? By the way, what is the difference between a sunSCREEN and a sunBLOCK?


How do marijuana and Prozac interact?

I have two friends who were recently diagnosed with depression. They were both prescribed Prozac by their respective doctors. Both of them are heavy marijuana users and both failed to mention that to their doctors. One has been on Prozac for two months and the other for six weeks. I have noticed that their behavior has become strange: mood swings, paranoia, oversleeping, fatigue. They continue taking their Prozac (20 mg a day) and continue smoking pot. I am afraid that there might be some negative interaction between the substances, one being an antidepressant and the other a depressant. Can you provide some insight?


Do mumps and swollen testes affect fertility?

I have a question about mumps: I had mumps while I was thirteen-years-old. I remembered that because of embarrassment. I was afraid to tell my parents about the inflammation (swelling of the testicles) at the same time I had mumps. I did not have treatment for the swelling of my testicles due to mumps. Later, the swelling went away about the same time as my mumps. Although I still can produce semen, I am deeply disturbed whether that swelling could have hindered my fertility (i.e., no production of sperm due to the blockage of the sperm channels).


Is liposuction permanent fat removal?

My husband and I are having a debate over the value of liposuction as a means to permanent fat removal. He has read that we are born with specific number of fat cells and therefore believes liposuction has the ability to reduce the number, resulting in permanent fat loss in the areas that are surgically treated. I differ in the belief that fat loss and its permanency depends on maintaining and correcting diet that is related to metabolism. I also maintain that there is no such thing as permanent fat loss from liposuction. Have you an answer to our debate?