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Resources for male survivors of childhood sexual abuse and incest

Dear Alice,

I am a male survivor of childhood (homo)sexual abuse and incest. I have recently stopped my horribly abusive alcohol and drug habits and am having to deal more with my issues now that I'm not using "painkillers." I'm worried that if I don't do something soon, I might be miserable for the rest of my life and may never be able to have a relationship or even sex. I am very hurt by the fact that there are no resources on campus for male survivors. All the groups are for women, as if male survivors don't exist. Anyways, please refer me to any resources you are aware of in NYC. Thanks.

Signed,
Uncomfortable

Dear Uncomfortable, 

You’re taking some important steps toward healing and recovery. You're right in noticing that there are quite a few groups for survivors of childhood sexual abuse and incest geared toward women. However, there are also groups specific for men in addition to groups for people of any gender. From your question, it appears you’re interested in groups for male survivors only. 

Contacting the Health and Welfare Department or Department of Health in your area to inquire about local support groups may be a helpful place to start. They can get you connected to some community-based resources. There are also various nationwide resources such as the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN). RAINN has a number of male-specific resources that may be helpful to check out. Some of these resources include a helpline, information about accessing therapy, and informative articles. Additionally, 1in6 is an organization specifically dedicated to male sexual abuse and assault with support groups. 

For more information or support that’s available to people of any gender, you might also check out other organizations such as: 

If you’re a college student, you might consider searching your school’s website. Oftentimes, they have specific departments related to sexual violence with a number of on- and off-campus resources available. Often campus Title IX or gender-based violence offices have advocates that may be able to help explain different options for phone counseling, referrals, reporting processes, or provide you with other resources that may be a good fit. If you’d rather explore a more individual approach, you might consider reaching out to your campus's mental health services. 

If upon exploration, you’re not finding the right fit for your needs, you may consider starting a group of your own (whether that's on- or off-campus) if you're feeling comfortable enough to do so. Reaching out for support can be challenging, but reaching out is a great first step in the process of healing and recovery.  
 
All the best, 

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Last updated Nov 03, 2023
Originally published Nov 06, 1998