Dear Alice,

I would like to know why those in the "sex-advice" industry always tell men that size doesn't matter? Almost every woman I have talked to, an admittedly unrepresentative sample, says size DOES matter. They don't want the guy to be too big, but they don't want him to be very small either. All things being equal, bigger, up to a point, seems to be better in the male equipment department.

Do sex advisors tell men size doesn't matter just to make men feel good?

from, Not too big, but not too small either

Dear Not too big, but not too small either,

Speaking for herself, Alice's responses to penis size ponderings tend to tow the size-doesn't-matter line because there can be so much more to relating sexually than the length and width of a partner's penis. Why there's kissing, holding, intimacy, eye contact, one-ness, touching, soul-bearing honesty, trust, breasts, butts, toes, hair, discovery, and so on. Sure, penis size is a big deal to some, while others see it as a little piece of a much bigger sex pie.



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