I am a male undergrad who has never had sex before, but I am currently in a relationship in which I may soon. This sounds silly, but after sex, is there a graceful way to remove and discard a condom without ruining the moment? I am not exactly uncomfortable about any of this, but it does seem like a slightly unpleasant maneuver... or not?
A "Sheathed" Panoose
Dear A "Sheathed" Panoose,
Congratulations on being committed to using a condom the first time! That way, you'll be in the habit of using condoms for sex. You deserve a pat on the back for protecting yourself in the sack. As for taking off the condom after your first time, it can help to do it with a joke, sigh, or moan. You might also want to keep a trashcan or a tissue handy to throw away the used condom.
In addition, you can rest much easier if you use the proper technique to remove the condom. Start by pulling out of your partner right after ejaculation, while your penis is still hard. Make sure you hold the base of the condom when you pull out so the condom stays on. Then, while still holding the base of the condom, slide the condom off the penis, being careful to keep the semen inside of the condom and away from your partner. The condom can be tied off, and it should be thrown away in the trash, not the toilet. If you get some semen on your hands or body, you may want to wash yourself off before getting back in bed. (If you're still feeling uneasy about being smooth when the time comes, you can always perfect your moves by practicing on your own.)
While you're up, be a gentleman by putting on some underwear or offering your partner his or hers before getting back in bed. Even if there aren't any other plans for penetration, body fluids can still be exposed and exchanged, which may lead to pregnancy or sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
Hats off to you,Alice!