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Creative ideas for a long-distance Valentine's Day

Hi Alice,

My boyfriend is on a Naval ship and I wanted to do something special for him, for Valentine's Day. We have email, but I can't really send a lot via that. I want to make his day, but I don't know what I can do for him, with such limited access to things. Any Ideas? Let me know.

— S

Dear S,

The proverb goes that absence makes the heart grow fonder, but what do you do when it’s Valentine’s Day and you’re feeling especially fond of your partner? Ultimately, what you decide may depend on your relationship with your boyfriend and the dynamic between you two.  Maybe you’re both hopeless romantics, or cerebral academics, or musical geniuses. You may consider sending written words of love, desires, fantasies, and goals, which can be powerful substitutes in the absence of direct one-on-one contact. Or, if the old-fashioned love-letter has lost its romantic luster, here are a few suggestions for a special long-distance Valentine's Day:

  • An "I love you" bookmark sent via snail mail or e-mail
  • Coupons he can redeem when he sees you, such as for one hot steamy kiss, a back rub, a foot rub, a sensual bath... together, etc.
  • Homemade valentines (paper or electronic) — you can include photos of you both together, drawings of inside jokes you have, or some sweet nothings, all infused with your love and artistic flair
  • A book of erotic stories
  • Love poetry — either written by a favorite author or poet, or personally written by you
  • His favorite Valentine’s Day candy or sweet treat
  • A voice recording that tells your partner what you'll do when you're together, a song you've composed just for your partner, or a mix of your favorite love songs
  • A video montage of your relationship together or a favorite romantic film
  • A favorite book that you’ve read recently, that you know he’ll love too
  • Erotic art — you can buy a print at a museum store or art shop, or draw/paint/sculpt/photograph/create your own

For more information on dealing with long distance relationships, check out the Long-Distance & On-Line Relationships category in the Go Ask Alice! Relationships archive. Remember, the possibilities are limitless — all you need is a little creativity... and love.

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Last updated Feb 10, 2017
Originally published Feb 13, 1998

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