Week of:
Apr 03, 2020

Can loneliness kill?

Dear Alice,

I've thought and thought about this, but can loneliness kill you? I've lived through my teenage years, twenties, three-quarters of my thirties, but am still hoping that just around the corner will be the one. If not — can loneliness kill you?

Where can I stay during break?

Dear Alice,

Where can I stay if I can't go home during college breaks? I came from an abusive household. What are your suggestions? Are there places students can stay at a reasonable price?

Depressed and shy: Finding the courage to get help

Hi Alice,

I have been struggling with debilitating depression for ten years. I am finally realizing that I need help, but I'm finding it difficult to get the courage. I am very shy as well. What do you say when you call a psychiatrist or a psychologist's office? "Hi, I'm really messed up and I have no idea how this works. Do I make an appointment or what?" I'm really nervous about making the call, and what kind of questions will be asked during that first conversation. This is not an easy or comfortable topic for me to discuss, and I would have no clue about what to say after "hello." Any words you could offer would be of great help.

Thanks very much,
Worried & Confused

Unbearable mom

Hi Alice,

I've recently moved back home with my parents and I'm struggling! While I know this is the best option for me financially, I can't help wishing I could just leave.

My Mum doesn't work right now, so she's constantly at home. I'm studying part time from home, and working 20 to 24 hours per week. I feel like I never have time to myself! It has come to the extent that I now feel paralyzed in my bedroom, unable to even get up because I don't want to see her. I don't think this is helped by the fact she has always been very pushy, and had ambitions for me that I could never fulfill. She constantly acts as though I am a disappointment and I feel helpless and totally unmotivated to work, and now even get out of bed, in this environment.

On top of this, during an argument a few weeks ago, I said something along the lines of, 'you don't own me, you don't have the right to run my life' and my Mum said, that she does in fact, own me, I am her daughter and I belong to her, and she will always be in control of my life. She treats me like a child. I can't go anywhere without demanding questions: where are you going, who with, what time will you be back, why, how, what, etc. She comes into my room without knocking, no matter what I'm doing, or what state of dress I am in. I am 23, and completely stuck. I see no other option for my mental health than to move out again and seriously reduce the amount of contact I have with her. But I can't afford to.

Can you please give some suggestions as to how I can make this more bearable? Thank you.

Displaced by hurricane — Settling into my new home?

Alice,

I am a displaced New Orleans student at my college, and I am still having issues since the hurricane. I have been getting counseling, but it doesn't seem to be helping. I loved my life in New Orleans and at my school. Everyone keeps telling me "to make the best of it," and I'm really trying to. For instance, I try to go to events and meet people. I have been very outgoing and friendly even though I am not a natural extrovert. It takes a lot of energy out of me, and it just doesn't seem to be paying off. I also feel very isolated being around people that don't understand what I'm going through. I've tried to get in contact with other New Orleans students, but I've had difficulties. I feel like I'm going to go crazy being this depressed for another couple of months. Furthermore, I fear that everything will be drastically different when I return to New Orleans, and I'll never get my life back. Also, sometimes I feel guilty feeling sad because my situation could be so much worse. I just don't what else to do!

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