Italian ice breakers

Originally Published: May 21, 1999 - Last Updated / Reviewed On: January 4, 2013
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Hi Alice,

First of all you excuse my English as I’m Italian guy. My problem is that I’m good looking guy... good career... I have many friends... girls and boys. (I’m straight.) but many of the girls that I know seemed to be interested with me more than friends (I like this feeling). But the problem is I can't do the move to break the ice. I always wait for her to take the first step and she's waiting for me to initiate. So please tell me how to break this ice with cool way.

Dear Reader,

Ciao bel ragazzo! Ti abbiamo capito perfettamente.

Since you are already friends with these women, you're in a good position to warm things up a little if that's what both of you desire. Think for a moment about one of these potential romantic partners: what would you do with her as a girlfriend that you wouldn't do now as regular friends? Short of sex, might it be spending some extra time with her, paying her extra attention, looking into her eyes a little longer and more intensely than usual, or touching her on the hand, arm, or shoulder in a way that communicates more than just friendship? What about proposing some romance-enhancing outings: dinner at an intimate, candlelit restaurant; a walk in the park; a day trip to the sea. The simple use of words may melt the ice: "I really enjoy spending time with you, and I'd like to get together more often, if you'd like to as well"; or the more direct, "Would you ever want to go out on a date?"

If you and one of these friends are both interested in taking the next step toward romance, let the heat between you melt away the ice that now keeps you frozen in friendship. These good vibrations may eventually move you to hold hands, lock arms, and even kiss. It can be the simplest of gestures or statements that starts you down a romantic path.

Cultural expectations and words vary in our world, but, sometimes, just taking a chance and expressing yourself to someone is the best ice breaker of all. Do keep in mind that cultural differences and expectations may cause people to misinterpret cues, especially non-verbal signs. For this reason using words and being upfront and honest is a wise way to overcome challenges and ensure you are both sharing the same feelings and desires. You may also want to check out the related questions below for other thoughts and ideas.

As the saying goes, nothing ventured, nothing gained. E buona fortuna,

Alice