Boobs! Not just for foreplay anymore

Originally Published: October 17, 2008 - Last Updated / Reviewed On: October 24, 2008
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Dear Alice,

My boyfriend has suggested "tit sex" as an alternative to intercourse, which we want to wait a while to go ahead and do. I want to know, what exactly is "tit sex" and how do you do it? Will it hurt?

Dear Reader,

One of the most enjoyable (although sometimes confusing) things about sex is the variety of ways to be intimate with a partner. "Tit sex" also known as "breast sex," a "tit wank," a "tug job," or the more formal "mammary intercourse," is a form of outercourse, or sex without penetration. During breast sex, a man's penis is placed between a woman's breasts and then rubbed back and forth for stimulation. Breast sex is not usually painful, but couples sometimes use lubrication for more pleasure and to minimize any discomfort caused by chafing. As your boyfriend suggested, breast sex may be an enjoyable and generally low-risk alternative to intercourse, especially if you're trying to avoid pregnancy or sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

However, even breast sex can have risks. Some STIs (like herpes and pubic lice) can be transmitted by skin-to-skin contact. Also, if your boyfriend ejaculates near your face, it's possible that some of his semen may get into your eye, which could transmit an infection or cause irritation. If you're not keen on getting a pool of semen on your face or chest (also known as a "pearl necklace"), you might want to have some tissues or a towel handy.

Another consideration is that breast sex is often combined with oral sex, where a woman will orally stimulate the head of the penis while continuing to squeeze and rub the shaft between her breasts. To protect against STIs, you might want to take a few precautions like using a condom and being tested for STIs before launching into mammary humping or any other sexual pleasures.

Before experimenting with breast sex (or any new sexual foray), you might also want to think about your own sexual preferences and boundaries, and then talk with your partner. For example, where and how do you like to be touched? Does breast fondling turn you on? Are you comfortable getting up close and personal with your boyfriend's penis?

Breast sex can be a safe and titillating addition to a couple's sexual repertoire. Just remember to keep the lines of communication open and protect yourself and your partner. Columbia students can get condoms or receive STI testing at Primary Care Medical Services (PCMS). To make an appointment, call x4-2284 or log in through Open Communicator.

If you decide that breast sex is not for you or you want to explore other options first, there are plenty of satisfying alternatives to intercourse such as passionate kissing, full body massage, partner masturbation, and dry humping. To get your creative juices flowing, check out the related Q&As below.

Alice

October 24, 2008

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Dear Alice,

Not that there's anything wrong with tit sex, but make sure he's going to return the favor. Tit sex may be very enjoyable for the man, but it's really kind of boring for the...

Dear Alice,

Not that there's anything wrong with tit sex, but make sure he's going to return the favor. Tit sex may be very enjoyable for the man, but it's really kind of boring for the woman — it doesn't stimulate anything exciting (not even the nipples). Make sure he's going to give back by doing something for you, like massaging your clitoris or using a sex toy on you, or whatever you like.