Can excessive masturbation affect my orgasms?

Dear Trying To Reach Orgasmic Plateau Again, 

It’s great that you’re in touch (no pun intended) with yourself and aware of how your body functions! Solo stimulation play can be a great way to explore what you like or don’t like. That said, masturbating often may lead to desensitization, which means it could take you longer to orgasm. Also, when it comes to have sex with your partner, what brings you to orgasm may be different compared to solo play. Therefore, it may take a bit longer to figure out what you need to reach the climax you’re used to. But fear not, there are ways to keep those climaxes coming (pun intended). Keep reading to learn more. 

What are the benefits of masturbation? 

It’s not just pleasure that comes from masturbation, there are many physical and mental health benefits, including: 

• Reducing stress 
• Reducing tension 
• Enhancing sleep quality 
• Elevating mood 
• Relieving menstrual cramps 
• Easing pain 
• Improving self-esteem and body image 

List adapted from Medical News Today 

Keep in mind that everyone’s body is different. The effects of masturbation can differ from person to person, so don’t worry if this list isn’t what you experience. 

Can masturbating affect your sexual function? 

While some may believe myths about masturbation, such as masturbation causing erectile dysfunction or infertility, there is no evidence to support these claims. However, for some people, masturbating may lead to sexual desensitization. Meaning that if you masturbate often, it can lead to your body being less responsive to sexual stimulation. But don’t get it twisted, regular masturbation doesn’t mean that you’re permanently desensitized to orgasms. It simply means that you may need more time to reach orgasm (known as orgasmic threshold). While anyone that masturbates can experience desensitization, if you have a vagina, you may find desensitization a more common phenomenon.  

Is it possible to masturbate too much?  

When it comes to masturbation, it may be possible to have too much of a good thing. Masturbation can become excessive when it starts to interfere in your day-to-day functioning. To decide whether too much pleasure has led to more harm than good depends on you and your circumstances. To break this down, you may want to ask yourself some questions like:  

• What does masturbating ‘too much’ mean to you?  
• Does it interrupt your daily life? 
• Does it interfere with your school, work, or social life to a harmful degree?  

If you believe that you may be masturbating too much, you might want to speak with your health care provider or a mental health provider to discuss potential options for cutting down or getting treatment. 

What other factors affect your ability to orgasm? 

You mentioned that it was easier to achieve orgasms more frequently in your teens than in your early twenties. Age may influence your ability to orgasm. This isn’t to say that being in your early twenties means you’re left with a quarter-life crisis and a missing libido. In general, as you grow older, your sexual responses and sensitivities to pleasure can change.  

Another factor to think about is your mental well-being. Psychological distress, such as depression, anxiety, and other conditions, can affect your sexual pleasure. Additionally, when your mind is preoccupied with strong emotions about different events in your life it can have an impact too. As such, anxiety and stress can be huge mood killers both outside and inside of the bedroom. If you think this may be affecting your ability to orgasm, it may be helpful to ask yourself if you feel like your worry about your partner’s boredom during sex might be keeping you from climaxing? If so, it may be helpful to have a conversation with your partner to find out how they’re actually feeling. This may help to relieve some of your concerns.  

Speaking of communication, this could be another factor. You’re the expert on your own body, so you know what you like during sex. That said, consider asking your partner to do some of the fun techniques you like to do when you masturbate. Also, the amount of time it takes for you to orgasm may be longer, but there’s nothing wrong with that. For some people, incorporating more foreplay can make it easier to orgasm. Talking about this new normal with your partner may bring in some new ways to play during sex.  

What can you do to improve your ability to orgasm? 

Introducing sex toys, different positions, or rousing techniques can be some fun ways to explore. You may be accustomed to the usual techniques when you masturbate or have sex. So, you might want to come up with new creative ways to finally hit that sweet spot. You can talk about your newfound exploration of orgasms with your partner if you want to bring them on this journey with you. 

If you’re still concerned about the frequency of your orgasms, consider speaking with your health care provider or a mental health provider specializing in sexual health. They may be able to help you figure out if anything else is affecting your ability to reach the big ‘O’ and support you in creating a plan to achieve it.  

Hope this was a solo mission accomplished,